A friend asked me recently:
What do I do when I don't know what to write about?
My answer:
Write as if you're already dead.
That was the only way I was able to finish my book, Un-Crap Your Life in 2015.
So, let's dive deep into this topic.
You can’t get mad at a corpse for telling the truth.
What do I mean by this?
One of my entrepreneur mentors recently told me I have a skill that is in short supply: telling the truth no matter how raw that truth is. He said my writing reminded him of a child’s approach, which means that it isn’t concerned with outcomes or ego. This is true. I write to communicate my deepest thoughts that currently have no ears. I’m dying to be heard after being so quiet for my entire life. I write to understand. To me, writing is just thinking on paper.
So, how do I do this?
Writing the truth is difficult, but why do I find it easy to do?
It’s so much easier to tell the truth and write with clarity once you pretend you’re already dead. Pretending you’re dead effectively kills your ego, deletes your shame and allows you the freedom to express what your truth actually is.
The major roadblock to writing in the case of confessing your truth is the harsh judgment from others you believe might occur as a consequence. Or you might be scared your boss will fire you if he discovers your deepest truths. Or you’re afraid that your views might offend your relatives.
I used to be afraid of all these things, too.
But then I got rid of my bad boss that was constricting my airwaves. I got rid of my bad relationship that was limiting my possibilities. I have mostly banished my fear of offending relatives. I’m still working on this one, though.
Fear of losing one's reputation is a very destructive emotion. And we all know what happens when we lose our reputation in Steemit. Fear keeps us insulated from discovering what we actually think. Fear debilitates the truth and most people are afraid of admitting what they really think.
When you tell your truth, you can no longer continue lying to yourself. Telling the truth also leaves you vulnerable to other people’s judgement. But telling the truth brings people who genuinely like you to your doorstep. The truth brings people together in a happy, non-judgmental way.
We humans were raised in a pack and we care deeply what the herd thinks of us. If we go out on the precipice by ourselves and express our truth, we risk being outcasted, which our brains interpret as death. However, if the truth teller already feels like an outcast, then it’s much easier to continue telling the truth because becoming an outcast is not viewed as a threat, it is already a reality. But there exists a fine line here. For me, it wasn't until I quit my corporate jobs, and finally declared to the world that I am a freelance writer. I took this plunge about a year and a half ago and ever since then, I have been relying on my own intuition, creativity, curiosity and internal compass to guide my actions. Writing my truth has become one of my survival tactics. (It wasn't always...in fact, at corporate jobs, I would find myself getting in trouble a lot for being honest. Companies aren't usually dedicated to honest people.)
So my method takes this outcast idea a step further and conceives of a future time when I will no longer exist. What truth is worthy of exploring from a future point when I won’t exist? If I’m already dead, there is no reason to write about bullshit. That would be a complete waste of resources. If my ego is not alive, then I’m forced to write for a different purpose. I am forced to write about things that I think matter.
It’s taken me a lifetime to acquire the necessary guts to tell the truth.
There are still some truths that I don’t yet want to confront but that amount is diminishing. Quitting my alcohol habit has helped me achieve a clearer way of viewing life. Also, I’m no longer trying to impress members of the opposite sex. Trying to attract a mate is a surefire way to lying and boasting. I used to fluff out my feathers, boast and lie in order to get the attention of some men. Trying to attract others is a distraction I simply don’t have time for any more. I have become mission-driven in the past few years, and everything that doesn't fit into the mission is simply a distraction.
I never considered myself to be a “writer” until recently, but I am a keen observer, always have been. This love of observation used to take the form of photography. I was always interested in trying to record "reality" without people's permission. I got in trouble for this, too.
The one thing I ask myself while I’m writing is this:
“Am I telling the truth or lying to myself?”
I used this method in order to write my Medium post, I Had Sex For The First Time When I Was 8 Years Old.
Out of everything I've ever written, that's the only article that has gone viral. To date, that article has 156,000 views. (Maybe I should publish it on Steemit? I hadn't even thought about that.....)
It was a very painful memory however when I imagined myself dead in the future, I was able to separate my emotions and feelings of shame from the writing process. I was also able to distance myself from the experience and that is a very important part of writing your truth. I think it’s very difficult to write about things that are happening now. Time and distance create a better understanding of the true events that shaped you.
I have nothing to prove and no one to impress now. I’m fortunate I’m still alive. I’m writing because my mental stability depends on it. And I think the world would be a better place if we all started telling the truth.
I cling to idealism and the concept of utopia because those notions thrive within my nightly dreams and imagination. And I would guess that those notions thrive within your deepest consciousness, too. We now have the tools in Steemit to create a world worth living in, if we use our deepest expressions of our imaginations.
There is a curious child who resides beneath the layers of your jaded adulthood.
This child is color-blind. This child loves without shame, gives without greed, dances without regret and smiles without fakery. This child has been in the shadows of your mind, waiting patiently for you to find the strength to release him/her from the prison of your adulthood.
I am not the only writer who suggests to write as if you're dead. Think about the absurdity of this for a moment:
Following Nadine Gordimer and Christopher Hitchens, Eugenides encourages young writers to write as if they're dead. By this, he means that they should write without regard to popularity, or, as Hitchens says, "as if the usual constraints—of fashion, commerce, self-censorship, public and, perhaps especially, intellectual opinion—did not operate." Thus, in the one work that Trollope actually did write knowing it would appear after he died, the author did exactly what Hitchens says he should, speaking truth without regard to reputation. And that truth was that he'd spent his life writing for commerce and the public in exactly the manner that Hitchens said he shouldn't. - The Atlantic
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