I remembered those words clearly as if it was yesterday. Words that lingers on for so many years. Words that shouted at me when I was at one of my lowest point. The point when I was under depression.
The time when I cried every night wishing when I sleep I will never wake up.
The time when every food and water seems tasteless.
The time when laughter during family gathering seems like a funeral.
The time when my bed room was my favorite place to be in.
The time when nothing in my life is meaningful.
The time when I walked around like a zombie feeling nothing but sadness.
And yes, I hide from people because they will utter the question "Why can't you SNAP out of it?".
At that moment, I wish I can. I prayed I can just switch off my depression switch. But it was NOT easy because depression is not merely a light switch that you can on and off anytime you want. It was like I was trapped in a world of darkness unable to find my way out. My mind just continues to ponder, and wonder, and emotions (dark negative emotions) just flows in like flash flood flooding my inner being. I tried meditating. I tried self help books. I tried going to parties and drinking myself silly. I tried retail therapy. I tried group sessions. Nothing worked.
We really tried our best to SNAP out of it. If only depression works like that but it Does not. Yes, maybe some who were depressed snaped out of if when people shouted them to SNAP out it but not all of us can.
So, my word of advice to all who has friends and family members who are depress, please try the following :-
- Be patient
- Be understanding
- Be caring and loving
- Motivate them to exercise and be active
- Give them some space and regularly check on them
- Do NOT tell them "but you are so lucky, you have a great husband, good car, rich and etc?" NO NO NO
- If really really they are getting worst, bring them to a professional.
- Be a friend to them to motivate and not a lecturer and lecture.
- For spouses, give them a sense of security cos most of the depressed people feel insecure.
There are many more things we can do to help those who are depressed. Just be patient. Don't give up.