Bitter-Sweet-Sour?
Is that how it tastes now? I can't tell cos I'm way gone, so far along the misery that calls itself life. I suffer from a rare but very common ailment; forgotten memories.
See I have forgotten how it feels to be young. To be so innocent and naive. I have forgotten how it feels to be a child and be called someone's little pride. I forgot how it felt to be at the center of attention; to be called mum's hand-bag on her way out, and receive gifts on our way back. I forgot what innocence felt like.
Who remembers the anxiety of a first crush? The joy and the sadness. The occasional eye-to-eye glances, so short. Then we look away. Who remembers the disappointment of being caught on your first love letter? And the piercing guilt that comes after.
Have you ever been in love? Now have you ever been madly in love? How did that feel? That awkwardness which stemmed from having a crush on your female seat partner. How about the confusion and unpleasant feeling of not knowing what to do in a first relationship? How about your second? Third? What's your body count? Or you forgot that too?
See I've forgotten what it feels like to be me. I've lost all sense of being. My nuances borrowed from another. And when the end shall come, I'll have forgotten what it feels like to have lived.
But the one thing that gives me hope;
Is that I'll forever know I was here. That I lived. That I loved. And that I learned.
Till then, let's bask in the vanity of never remembering.
To forgotten memories.
NB: R.I.P XXXTentacion (18/6/18)
Gone but never forgotten
