If Lizzy's heart had a voice she was sure that it would be singing.
The doors of her wardrobe were wide open. The floor of her room was barely visible underneath the pile of clothing and accessories that suddenly seemed hardly worthy of any occasion. She understood they would simply be going on an innocent trip to the pier, but something about this event made it seem a bit more meaningful than any of the other times she had spent with Chase. Many factors inflated its significance to Lizzy. She thought about the look Granger had given them, and the way Chase's smile brightened when she told him where to pick her up. And so, as she held a long ivory skirt in her hand, Lizzy shook her head. Discarding it over her shoulders, she gave into the overwhelming urge to go shopping.
Grabbing her phone, she messaged Tarryn, asking if she was available for an impromptu shopping spree that afternoon. Instantly, an optimistic reply came through, asking what the occasion was. Lizzy belatedly realized that the giggle she heard had come from her. She raked her hand through her hair and bit her lower lip, unsure of how to describe the outing. Surely, she was over-hyping the date in her head. Oh, whatever. She let her fingers fly across the keypad, conveying to Tarryn that she would be going out with Chase.
Sorry Liz I have plans tomorrow.
Something about the text felt off. However, Lizzy had woken up feeling positive about the day, so she shoved it to the back of her mind as something to think about later. Her friend was a busy woman. Not that she was one to talk, but Lizzy hoped that poor Tarryn wasn't overworking herself again.
It had been a while since she last treated herself to a proper shopping spree. Other than the sneakers, she couldn't recall when last, she had blown her budget on anything pretty for herself. Lizzy slipped on a black pants and a red strap top that matched with her shoes. No, seemed too casual for the pier. She definitely needed something new. Lizzy looked at her reflection and made a mental note to purchase some fresh make-up while she was out.
Lizzy managed to score an earlier lunch break. Thankfully, her negotiation (or bribe) with Josh was a success. The minute the clock hit 10AM she zipped out of the boutique at the speed of light. Instead of going to the mall near her work, Lizzy desired a change in location. She drove to the shopping district near the CBD. There were fewer cars on the road at the time, so her trip went well within her time limit. Finding parking, however, was a challenge. Slinging her bag over her shoulder, she made sure her car was locked, and then walked down the streets, soaking up the smells of the coffee shops and bakeries nearby.
Although she was excited about Friday, a part of her began to feel a bit silly that it warranted such a trip. However, immersing herself in her surroundings had an energizing effect, and soon her niggling reservations whittled away as she admired the clothing in the window sills. She couldn't wait to see what the mall had to offer.
Lizzy wasn't prepared for what she saw. The sight shook her to the core. She stood dazed and confused, wondering if those late nights of sewing and sketching had finally taken its toll on her eyesight. She blinked once, and then again. The scene didn't change. She watched as Chase sitting in his car, the window turned down, and his elbow sticking out. He was laughing and chatting with someone he seemed close with. The backseat appeared to be filled with shopping bags. His cheeks were stretched out wide, that infectious smile of his causing the person that accompanied him to smile widely as well.
It wasn't Chase and his terrible green cap that disturbed her. What caused her to pause in her step, and choke on her breath, was the fact that she recognized the other person in the car.
Lizzy thought she had looked wrong at first, but it really was him. That man. The very man who had the nerve to show up at the Richter's home and enjoy their refreshments. The coward who didn't bother talking to her. The one who survived— possibly even caused— the crash.
There he was comfortably sitting in the car alongside Chase as if this was their usual morning routine. Chase must have been on his way to get something, because he opened the car door and stepped out, saying something inaudible to the person in the car. As if a magnetic pull was in the works, he raised his eyes to meet hers.
Time seemed to stop.
Lizzy didn't know what kind of reaction she was expecting from him. She found herself almost hoping— praying— that his response would be something casual and oblivious. She hoped that his reaction would convey that he was blissfully unaware, that her suspicions were utterly wrong.
As his dark eyes bored into hers, holding her gaze, she could see the color quickly draining from his face.
Lizzy's mind cleared and suddenly, with extreme and disappointing clarity, she realized something: Chase wasn't the transparent person he portrayed himself as.
Chase felt his heart hammering against his chest. He found his feet carrying him forward to where the blonde-haired woman stood. She took a step back when he neared her.
Damn it, was this really happening? Now?
"Lizzy, hi," he managed. Her blank expression unsettled him.
Her grey-eyes begged him to explain. She kept looking at the middle-aged man who hadn't yet noticed the tense atmosphere that filled the parking lot. Lizzy recalled that during a brief conversation about family, Chase had mentioned his father that he chauffeured around. Lizzy's eyes flickered from the man in the silver car, to the person with the jet-black hair and guilt-filled eyes.
He inhaled deeply, still coming to grips that this interaction was occurring at all. "Lizzy, look, I know what this must look like."
His words confirmed her suspicions.
"Oh my god," she murmured. A look of deep-seated hurt flashed in her eyes. "Oh my god, you know."
Chase opened his mouth, but was unable to retort as Lizzy's words trailed off. "The two of you... You know him, right? Of course, you do. Does that mean..." she wondered aloud, speaking mostly to herself. Her eyes snapped up to him, her tone increasing in intensity. "Who is he to you, Chase?"
She needed to hear the answer from his own mouth. Although she was afraid of what she would hear, she desperately wanted to put her whirring conclusions to rest. Chase held his hand to the back of his head, a gesture of anxiousness. With his voice lowered, he told her that the man was his father. The confirmation alone opened the door of a whole load of implications that had Lizzy questioning her entire relationship with Chase.
"You knew, didn't you?" she asked. She didn't give him a chance to answer. "When you spoke to me that day at the beach you knew who I was...right? Is that why you made a point to get to know me?"
"Look, Lizzy, don't get the wrong idea," he interrupted her flurry of questions. "I didn't know until after that, I swear. I've never approached you with malicious intentions, not even from the start, please believe me."
She recalled his expression before they shook hands to introduce themselves. Was that the moment when it clicked, when he realized who she was? The particulars hardly mattered to Lizzy in that moment.
"Chase, I don't even know what to think. You seem to have a pretty good idea about who I am, and who that person— who your father is to me... You seem to understand how complicated this is, I mean, why else would you keep this from me!"
"Hear me out," he started, reaching for her shoulder. She avoided his touch.
"Hear you out?" her voice was high-pitched, and she felt close to the verge of tears. "Did you get a kick out of it or something? Was something about getting to know me while keeping me in the dark exciting to you?"
Chase stood with his hands hovering in the air, fighting the urge to hold her in place so that he could explain to her. He scrambled for his words. "Lizzy, listen to me, Lizzy. I didn't mean to deceive you. When I met you at first, I really didn't know, and you seemed like a great person. I genuinely enjoy spending time with you. I didn't mean to keep this from you— I understand how big of a deal it is and how bad it looks."
He let out a laborious breath. "My dad..." he started, looking over his shoulder at the man. "You've got to understand, he doesn't know about you, not everything at least."
His words made little sense. What Lizzy couldn't understand was why he insisted on speaking in riddles.
"What were you thinking, Chase, that I wouldn't find out one day? What am I supposed to think? All this time you've known things about me that I couldn't even bring myself to tell you. I mean, it's a topic that I struggle to breach or even think about. But then I started trusting you...and after all this time, you were just smiling away and talking to me pretending you knew nothing, when you damn well know a lot more than you let on." She stopped Chase from countering, throwing her arm in the direction of the car. "And, what—is he just going to continue sitting there watching us from the safety of that car?
She saw the man shrink in his seat when she gestured towards him. Chase placed both his hands on her shoulders, successfully earning her full attention.
"It's called an accident for a reason. Lizzy. I'm sorry, but it's true."
His words had the effect of a slap in the face, causing Lizzy to inhale sharply.
A look of apology softened his features. Chase continued to explain, "In the beginning I had this idea that maybe I could apologize on his behalf. I was just as surprised as you are now when I figured out who you were at the cove. I'm sorry Liz. I can't begin to imagine what you're thinking or feeling. But, yes, that is my dad. I know about what happened, how complicated this may be for you. I don't know if you know, but he's tried to come see you and the others several times...I don't know, I guess he just couldn't see it through. So, when I saw you, and I realized who you were, I thought maybe...I don't know."
Lizzy couldn't believe what she was hearing. He rambled on senselessly trying to share his perspective with her. Lizzy, barely aware of the stares they were gaining, struggled to swallow the lump in her throat. Not only did Chase have this unwarranted insight into her life, it appeared very likely that he had the bright idea of somehow conning her into an interaction she wasn't prepared for.
He confirmed a part of this when he continued, "I couldn't find the right time to tell you. I guess I just got so caught up in us. I didn't count on the fact that we'd get along so well or that we'd stay in touch for so long. Every time I tried to tell you, either something came up or I stopped myself, because I didn't want to disappoint you. I found myself waiting for you to say something related to the incident so that I'd finally get the chance to tell you."
So, going by his logic, it was her own reluctance to open old wounds about David's tragedy that lead to Chase keeping her in the dark.
Tears prickled Lizzy's eyes.
"So, I'm right, you really did approach me with an agenda," she stammered. "Did you really expect me to just somehow be okay with all of this?"
"I didn't expect any of this! I didn't expect to run into you now, I didn't expect you to accept this easily, I didn't have a clue who you were at first and I never would have expected that I'd fall for you," Chase spat out his words one after the other, caught up in the heat of the moment.
His statement brought the entire exchange to a halt. When he realized what he had said, his eyes widened, instantly meeting hers.
Everything from that point onward was a blurry mess. Her mind played out various versions in which she could have dealt with the scenario: slapping Chase, crying, or yelling at the man in the car. Instead, she had told Chase to stay away from her. He called out after her, but she walked as fast as her feet could carry her. She paid his calls no mind.
She slammed the breaks of her car, pulling into her parking space near the boutique. Overwhelmed, Lizzy leaned her head on the steering wheel, feeling completely flustered at the way things played out. She felt embarrassed for losing her cool, but most of all, she felt hurt by the audacity he had in trying to justify his deception. Not only had his silence placed her in an awkward position, it seemed to Lizzy very possible that Chase had been meaning to manipulate her into forgiveness for his Old Man's sake.
She didn't know how much of his words she could trust. She wiped away the tears that streamed down her eyes. Betrayal, frustration, and confusion. Lizzy was at a loss of what to do next.
Perhaps, Josh was right about Murphy's Law.
If something can go wrong, it will go wrong.
The rule certainly seemed to apply to her life. She opened her calendar app and deleted the reminder for Friday's plans. And then, after a deep breath, Lizzy got out of the car and walked into the boutique.
Her attempt at carrying along normally that afternoon was absolutely suffocating. She debated calling Tarryn, but recalling her last interaction with her friend, she felt it would be too much trouble. For some reason, she felt as though there was something keeping her from reaching out. She didn't want to be a clingy burden when her friend seemed so busy. Strange. Lizzy had barely noticed how seamlessly Chase had taken the role as her Go-To-Person when she needed to talk.
That evening, she scrolled through her contacts list. Without context there was no way her mother would understand what Lizzy was going through; explaining would only succeed in increasing her mom's anxiety. She briefly considered speaking with the folks at work, particularly Josh and Granger. However, her personal drama had nothing to do with work. She thought about Mrs. Richter. No, she couldn't do that to the poor woman. She pondered throwing on a hoodie and walking by the Richter's home just to look at it. Shaking her head to herself, she shot down the idea. Her emotions were in turmoil and she was afraid of what the sight would do to her.
Suddenly, Lizzy found herself realizing how very small her social circle was. It felt like ages since she had last been in touch with any of the people she would have invited to her wedding. She couldn't rant to her online followers even if she wanted to; they were simply there for fashion, nothing else. With a hollow feeling settling into her heart, Lizzy realized that she had only a few people she truly considered close. Somehow the idea of talking to any one of them about her feelings in that moment seemed a difficult thing to do.
On Friday it suddenly came to her; the only other person she could possibly confide in. Lizzy stood beneath the shade of the trees off campus. A few students trickled out of the building with their raucous laughter and nonchalant chatter as they made for their cars. Thankfully, she managed to catch the attention of the person she had come to see. Sam greeted her with a single wave before breaking away from his small group of friends. Lizzy felts she could do with the opinion of a level-headed, reasonable third party who would help her make sense of the mess that was her head. What she didn't count on was the confession she would hear.
