Image Source A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. ____ I have the world's largest collection of seashells. I keep it on all the beaches of the world... perhaps you've seen it. Steven

Image Source Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect. ____ My doctor told me I shouldn't work out until I'm in better shape. I told him, 'All right; don't send me a bill until I pay you.

Image Source A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory. ____ When I was 16... I worked in a pet store. And they fired me because... they had three snakes in there, and one day I braided them.

Image Source If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer? ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955 Died----

Image Source If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you. ____ I kept a diary right after I was born. Day 1: Tired from the move. Day 2: Everyone thinks I'm an idiot. Steven

Image Source They say the universe is expanding. That should help with the traffic. ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955

Image Source A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths. ____ I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done. Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author

Image Source I intend to live forever. So far, so good. ____ I was walking down the street wearing glasses when the prescription ran out. Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian

Image Source If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments. ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955

Image Source I intend to live forever. So far, so good. ____ Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring... 'How to Build a Boat.' Steven Wright Quotes   source here

Image Source What a nice night for an evening. ____ I busted a mirror and got seven years bad luck, but my lawyer thinks he can get me five. Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author

Image Source If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments. ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955

Image Source Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955 Died----

Image Source Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories. ____ Steven Wright Quotes   source here  Biography Author ProfessionComedian NationalityAmerican BornDecember 6, 1955 Died----

Image Source I do not have much patience with a thing of beauty that must be explained to be understood. If it does need additional interpretation by someone other than the creator, then I question whether

Image Source All my pictures are built around the idea of getting in trouble and so giving me the chance to be desperately serious in my attempt to appear as a normal little gentleman. ____ I remain just

Image Source Put a love note in his shaving kit before he leaves on a business trip. ____ Young love is wild and outrageous, laughing at moderation and blinding us to common sense. H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Image Source Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all they have. ____ Remember that creating a successful marriage is like farming: you have to start over again every morning. H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

Image Source Find a job you like and you add five days to every week. ____ Young love is wild and outrageous, laughing at moderation and blinding us to common sense. H. Jackson Brown, Jr. Quotes   source

Image Source Hope is not a resting place but a starting point - a cactus, not a cushion. ____ Remember that creating a successful marriage is like farming: you have to start over again every morning. H.