With all of the traveling I've been doing I see a lot of different faces, in a lot of different cultures and countries.
Most are NOT so obsessed with looking like they are 25.
MOST are into aging gracefully, or as I like to call it PRO-AGING.
Why would any of us want to ANTI-age?
I know there are many people who don’t want to age.
THAT is IMPOSSIBLE no matter how hard you try. That's one of those things we just have to "get over".
Wouldn't you rather age than the alternative?
And by the alternative, I mean death.
Or is “die young, stay pretty”, the preferred option?
I am extremely passionate about aging intelligently.
What do I mean by that?
You can age intelligently by caring for your skin, your mind, your body, your relationships, your career and your health.
We have to get out of the mindset that "aging is a curse".
I have seen gorgeous women (and men, for that matter) in France, Greece, Croatia, Italy, Spain, China and many other locales, who are absolutely stunning inside and out..
And over the age of 50.
Or 60.
Or 70.
Or 80!
They are living a good life, having fun, and taking care of themselves.
They are loving, making a contribution to their communities, wise, knowledgeable and resilient.
That is REAL beauty!
I'm just one of those women who can’t wrap her mind around “anti-aging”.
And it isn't just the entertainment industry that is obsessed with the clock not moving forward.
It's everywhere.
Is it Vanity?
Fear?
Ego?
Insecurity?
Societal pressure?
All of the above?
We can all spot, from a mile away, the person who has had so much work done on their face or their body that they don’t look real.
And let’s face it (lol, pun intended), a 70-year-old woman with an extreme facelift still does NOT look 40.
Plus, no 50 year old who has overdosed on fillers will ever look 25.
Don't get me wrong I wholeheartedly support taking care of yourself.
Get facials, Dermabrasion, Dermaplaning, some Botox, muscle stimulation and any of the non-invasive procedures that you fancy.
Along with that exercise, eat healthy foods - be a health advocate - but going under the knife, sometimes again and again and again, seems to me to be another addiction.
Is one ever REALLY satisfied after they get on that merry-go-round?
Have we become such an insecure society that we only care about how others see us and that influences how we see ourselves?
My West Virginian grandfather, on every one of his birthdays, would always say that he would rather be having a birthday than not!
It took me a while to get there and now I feel exactly the same way.
As we age, granted, everything isn’t still in its original place.
We may not have what we had in our teens, twenties or thirties.
However, if we really think about it most likely we have more.
Some of the most inspirational people I know and observe are not in those age categories.
That is not because I'm of a certain age, either. I have friends in their 20’s to their 80’s.
When was it decided that only youth was beautiful?
Is it a North American or western phenomenon?
In my teens, twenties, and 30’s I didn’t give aging a second thought.
I was too busy with my career, and in my VERY late 30's having and raising a child.
The sad thing is that today those groups are getting bombarded with the notion that one tiny wrinkle or a grey hair is a fatality.
AND...
Keeping up with whomever is the only way to beauty or self-worth.
We weren’t inundated with the products on the market today to keep us perpetually 25.
When did that happen?
Skin care IS important. Mostly so we don’t get skin cancer, which is a hell of a lot worse than a wrinkle.
I have never met anyone who died from a wrinkle.
With age comes wisdom. YES! It's CLICHÉ but it's true.
Maybe wisdom doesn't come to everyone over the age of 40 but those years are life experiences and life experiences teach us.
Who decided for me that my laugh lines were ugly or that my silver hair makes me old? (A guy on YouTube did last week but he was just asking for trouble online and I happened to be there.)
The fact that I'm not still wafer thin makes me less than?
Honestly, I'd rather be healthy and strong than skeletal.
BUT the pressures I have felt and see my friends experiencing are an uphill battle.
When did we lose our talent, creativity, abilities, and exuberance because we turned the corner of 40, 50 or 60?
I was out one evening in Vancouver, Canada with girlfriends between the ages of 40 and 60.
We were having a great time going dancing, hopping from restaurant to club, to coffee house.
We were laughing and joking and having an AMAZING time.
At one point in the evening, we were all crossing the street, and a group of 20 something women was crossing the street at the same time.
They started pointing at us, laughing and making jokes about us.
One of my friends turned around and shouted “What are you laughing at? We’re YOU in 20 years!”
Well, that shut them the bleep up.
If those ladies are LUCKY they will be anything like us in 20 years.
We were a group of attractive, accomplished, talented, vital, vibrant and SEXY woman.
We had life experience.
We were walking, talking, living, breathing, oozing experience.
Everywhere I go I learn something new from other women in other cultures. I love going into a European drug store to pour over the shelves of creams, notions and potions. Most which ultimately end up in my suitcase in the convenient travel size. Europe is light years ahead of us in self-care.
Eating right, exercising, meditating, being grateful, making a contribution somewhere, going for it, going with the flow and making your mark (whatever that is) at ALL ages - THAT'S the ticket.
It's wonderful to have older women friends to learn from and to absorb THEIR wisdom.
What is NOT wonderful is to have pressure to be someone else’s idea and image of perfection.
AT ANY AGE.
So go ahead and use those potions and lotions (cuz soft skin feels terrific), but don’t lose sight of your beauty inside and out.
Don’t let someone else tell you what is aging and beauty. (I'm also talking to the men out there, too. Pro-aging is not just for women.)
Find your support system and nurture it.
“Smell the roses.”
‘Grab for the gusto.”
‘Carpe diem”
“Go for it.”
‘You do you.”
Be YOUR best self.
AND never let someone else define you - at ANY AGE!
My wish for you is long and luscious PRO-aging on whatever continent you reside.
As always, thanks for reading.