I did not write this monograph to point out that parenting is hard, which it is regardless of autism. You are quite right there.

My child, by the way, would not get the feeling that prompted my vulnerability to share. Neither, it seems do you. I may pity myself, but I don't pity you (or my son, who is way the boss over me!).

I wrote to express my own personal feelings as a woman who is utterly fed up with the good press the auti-moms get for dealing with a disorder that always rains on my parade.
Besides, don't you hate autism, too? It sure makes you grumpy.

I am only interested in provoking people to think for themselves, and that's why I write. I believe that by listening VERY closely to others we learn much about ourselves. But I know that this is not a faculty readily available to those afflicted with autism.

My first posts were all to my sister, who reacts to my letters, exactly in the same tone as you do. From these you could tell that I am very much trying to understand how people with autism think, and how sad it makes me that this is not reciprocal.

The only war I have ever fought is against martyrs and warrior-moms! You and I may have more in common than you first read into me. Ultimately we both want to be heard and feel trapped inside our lonely little worlds.

Although I know reading me will not have come easy for you I am glad you took the trouble. I always hope my good intentions to eradicate autism from the human non- genepool work on a spiritual level. Call me cuckoo. By reading me you lend me energy to continue my quest for "awareness against autism". This requires me to work in "negative space" or a pre-manifest condition. It's like looking down from above, or a distant point in time. From this vantage point, there is nothing good about autism. I trust there is more to you than just autism, though.

I very much expected a reaction like yours to my post. Only I thought it would come from an autism warrior mum!

My writing style is infamously complex and overwhelming. My sister finds me abrasive and says I rant. Possibly, but I am not obtuse!