Holy smokin Jesus. It's Saturday!!
Which means BEER day! Let us set the world ablaze with beer!!
Ok, not really. I mean, it's wet for starters and it would be a dreadful waste.
I have been off for a week! Joyous times. I had a lot going on. Let me see, anything exciting?
I got a new phone!
Something which would normally be a joyous event but turned out to be a teeth-grindingly nauseous affair of head rubbing, chest-beating and much shouting at the sky of WHY??!.
As you might have gathered. It didn't bloody work. Not in the slightest. Pooped!
I blame Covid-19.
Anyway. Never mind all the nonsense!
Beer. What do we have?
We have a smoked porter from Fallen Brewing. Not just any old smoked porter. No no. This beast has been aged for many moons in Islay Whisky casks.
It promises to be a dense and meaty affair much like a Portuguese lady's slipper.
So let us get to it.
Mmmm, an Imperial smoked porter, aged in Islay whisky barrels for 18 months and then blended back in with some unaged stuff to smooth and mellow it out.
This sounds like a monster and if there is one thing that can be said about me, it's that I love getting to grips with monsters!
After all, they have much wetter vaginas.
Oh no he didn't!?
To the pouring!
It slips into the glass like a brooding back-cigar laid by a chimney sweep. I can smell the smokiness wafting over the top side of the glass.
It's 10% and I have two. It could go either way. I could end up singing Joe Longthorne songs in honour of my dear old Dad or I could end up in the local woods, scrapping with the Alpha fox to see who gets the honour of lifting Miss Red's bushy tail.
Did I ever mention, my son has red hair? I'm saying nothing more.
Let's taste this smokin devil of a thing.
How flaming donkeys in a can! That is my kind of booze! Throw me a crate of them and I will gladly obey lockdown for another three or four days.
It's smokey, caramel'y, peaty, whisky'ish, packed with burnt malt and yet it still manages to be as smooth as Michael Jackson at the School gates.
Something this silky smooth and tasty deserves almost all of the booms... 9/10 booms to be exact!
I'm happy. Are you?
Cheers everyone and have a good weekend.
Don't forget to stay safe!