Today I began my day feeling heavy, feeling bogged down. I had been thinking a lot about what is going on in my life at the moment and as is the way, I could feel myself starting to slip down into my sadness. Feeling sad is okay, it is part of life.But I do know that getting outside into my natural environment is one of my best therapies.
But sometimes when I feel like this, even stepping outside can seem like a huge mission. But today my two eldest daughters really wanted to go to the beach, my inner voice was saying yes, but my head was saying no. It's much easier to go with your head and just push on through your day.But they were very persistent, so off we all went. Bundling ourselves into my partners, brothers van.
The last time I took the road we travelled today, was prior to all the rain that we have had this year. As we left today, the sky was very dark, the clouds hanging heavy in the sky. It was exactly how I was feeling. In the distance was thunder, rumbling and echoing through the mountains, I do like this type of weather. I love thunder especially in the mountains, as it seems to amplify the sound. We drove on and as we did some rain began to fall.
One year ago a lot of this land was dry and bear, but not today, today there was green to be seen on these rocky mountains and the river was flowing fast and strong. There was even a waterfall next to the road that I never saw before. Wild flowers were gracing the mountainside with their presence, it was just what I needed to see.
It was like taking a deep breath, the type that really awakens your senses. It's amazing the amount of people who don't breath probably, who just take shallow breaths. I catch myself doing it sometimes. But just being outside in nature corrects our breathing. It makes us slow down, slow down and smell the roses, as the saying goes.
When I am outside surrounded by nature there is no place for my heavy heart. Out here I feel lighter, out here I can take a breath that cleanses me. Just driving along and taking in all that beauty made me breathe deep, made me feel lighter. We were driving towards the coast and leaving the mountains behind and with them the dark sky and heavy clouds. Just as the atmosphere around me became lighter so did I.
We got to the beach and the skies were blue, the sea was just a little choppy, it was perfect. Of course I still carried my pain. But by taking this drive and being next to the sea I got to recharge, to reconnect with the earth. To swim,to breathe deeply over and over again, to hear the sea lapping against the shore. All of this helps me to carry my pain, to honour it.
Life is not meant to be all raindrops and daffodils, we are meant to get dark skies and heavy clouds, we are meant to experience this because it helps us deal with our pain. Pain is real, it has a purpose, it is our bodies way of communicating with us. It is telling us to listen, to slow down, to honour ourselves and our bodies. It is telling us to take time out to heal.
