Some people out there like to poo poo on mindless consumerism. I have a confession to make. I love mindless consumerism and partake whenever the mood suits me. That's why it's "mindless", I guess. You partake of it without thinking of the broader implications of your purchase. You want it, and you want it now. The chemical hit. Why do I love it? Mindless consumerism is an engine of creativity and cultural change. It accelerates the evolution of a society, which is ironically, the reason why I think that consumerism is not mindless at all. It is directed evolution based on the purchasing behaviour of the masses. Whether you deliberated for endless hours on the purchase of a product or whether you acted on a whim, the end result is the same. I particularly enjoy how the wily entrepreneurs try to gain your business by giving you a narrative about the product using graphics and text. Runes and symbols of the modern age. I love a good marketing yarn, and I was recently persuaded to fork over some cash to buy a jar of honey harvested from flowers in the north of the Great White North. The best north. This is my review of ONEROOT’s Canadian Boreal Forest Raw Wildflower Honey.
Your honey sucks. That’s right. If you live south of the south of Canada, then you’re likely buying honey from your supermarket. What’s wrong with that? You ask. Well, according to the Oneroot marketing blurb, your polluted cities suck, your flowers suck, and your bees suck too. Ergo, your honey sucks. Full of contaminants, chemicals, syrup, and old leather shoes laced with fentanyl. Alright, I’m joking about the latter, but it’s probably not that far fetched if you think about it.
Oneroot cares about what you put in your mouth, so they decided to do something about this problem of laced (and likely illicit) honey that you shove in your mouth so blindly. They put on their lumberjack shirts, grew out their beards, put on a toque and headed out across Canada to find a clean meadow from which they could harvest the best raw honey. Their wacky bee adventures, I’m sure will be told one day. For now, imagine our intrepid bee hunters spreading out far and wide until they finally arrived in the colonies of Northern Ontario. They surveyed the hives and saw it was all good. Away from the pollution of the major cities and waterways, the flowers grow healthy- a property that is then transferred to the bees and through the bees, the benefits are passed on to you. No pesticides, no pollutants, no syrup, and NO FENTANYL.
Isn’t that a great and compelling narrative? Go check it out on the product's Amazon page
You see that’s what I’m talking about. Many companies nowadays have gone full woke, and sometimes this rubs me the wrong way. Oneroot does use some words like “ethical” and “organic”, which sound a bit like hippy talk. But they also make a compelling case. The northern climate and under-developed environment could lead to the healthier production of honey. If they are right, and honey from northern Canada is cleaner because of the climate and has more healthy nutrients than honey harvested elsewhere, then what’s not to like? They also mention that they test their honey at the University of Guelph every year. If you want a copy of the results (along with other relevant data), then they'd be happy to oblige. That takes big beaver balls. Imagine that. This company is saying, “our honey is the best honey, and here are the papers to prove it. Bam!”
So I was suckered into buying a jar of this raw honey, feeling a mix of shame (for mindless consumerism) and excitement (for raw unpasteurized honey from northern Canada), I clicked the buy button, and before the order had gone through, the package was already at my doorstep. Amazing considering I don’t even have a doorstep, but there it was. Amazon is so damn fast, they already know your decision even before you do.
This honey is sweet and delicious. I've tried it on tea and crepes. It tastes "healthy" and has a wonderful creamy texture. Whether it is superior to other honey in my area I cannot say. I sometimes purchase honey from the farmer's market because they sell several varieties like wild flower, buckwheat, blueberry, and fire-weed. You won't get these types of extravagant flavors from this wildflower honey by Oneroot, but it tastes wonderful nonetheless. I'm not gonna be shy about it, if you like exploring new types of honey, and have a healthy skepticism of marketing claims, then head over to Amazon and get yourself a jar. And if anyone accuses you of mindless consumerism, then just tell them to go suck on a dollop of honey. Just make it organic. Make it Oneroot Canadian Boreal Forest Raw Wildflower Honey.