For https://steemit.com/freewrite/@mariannewest/day-507-5-minute-freewrite-monday-prompt-hunger
I
The hunger of the clowns grows. They have those painted-on smiles.
No, wait, that's just their faces.
I'm told that would be scarier, but honestly, it's the make-up that's scarier. They're choosing to look that way. It doesn't freak me out if that's just how someone looks. But to change yourself?
Well, to each their own, but must we capitulate to the demands of the status quo?
Can I brag on me for a little before I get down on myself? I have a great hunger for my career. First, the bragging. Tomorrow I have a callback. I know I'm good. And I'm shooting something on Wednesday. Full week. And I have a CSz show on Friday. Heck yeah.
Now, a little humility. The idea of going out and bugging someone who doesn't really want to be bugged takes all the air out of me. My agent has suggested, and I'm sure she's right, that I might be getting more auditions if I just dropped in on casting director offices to hand them my headshot and resume and chat for a second.
I'm afraid to do this. Not least of all because, as much as I like figuring out how and what to do IN the job, "just chit-chatting" is not in my list of skillz. But also because I feel like I'm taking someone's time. Like I'm bugging them, because it's disingenuous, innit? I'm not really interested in anything but what they can do to get me a job. Sigh. Sigh. Nothing ventured nothing gained.