In his six years in the majors, Dallas Keuchel has become one of the league's best pitchers. He won the American League Cy Young award in 2015 and may be in the running this year despite missing over a month with a neck injury.
Although Keuchel is excellent at pitching, he is terrible at math.
According to an article in Deadspin, Dallas Keuchel is concerned his team does not have enough arms to contend for the World Series.
League Sources has uncovered a shocking truth: every single team this year has the exact same number of arms: 50.
That is right, every single team is tied for the number of arms on their team. League sources also discovered the eerie coincidence that each team also has 50 feet and 25 noses.
No one knows where Kucuhel got the outlandish idea that his team had fewer arms than every other one.
League sources did some digging and uncovered the fact that this has been the case for the entire 21st century. In 1999, the Milwaukee Brewers had 49 arms on their team. This was also the case for 9 others teams during the 1990's.
Each of those teams had one thing in common. They all had Jim Abbott on their team.
For those of you too young to remember baseball in the 1990s, Jim Abbot may be the greatest story in the history of baseball. Jim Abbot's statistics were average at best. He sported a career won/loss record of 87-108. His lifetime ERA was 4.25. He had a .976 fielding percentage and a .095 batting average. The highlight of his career came in September of 1993 when he pitched a no-hitter.
Aside from the no-hitter, there was nothing too spectacular about his career.
Oh wait. The dude was born without a right hand.
He played baseball at the highest level, fielded his position, and even got two hits without having a right hand. So yeah I exaggerated when I said there were only 49 arms on his team those years. But whatever. The guy had one hand!
Watching him field was one of the coolest things I have ever seen.
For all of you coaches out there, the next time one of your players tells you that they can't do something show them this.