"Our friends in Gaza tell us that Israel has massacred hundreds of thousands of innocent pregnant animal journalists."
Near Kibbutz Nir Oz, Gaza Envelope, November 4 - The yellow concrete-and-metal posts that the IDF has set out to delineate the points past which armed Palestinians may not tread constitute an environmental hazard, activists warned today, as they endanger the precarious, unique habitat of the creatures that live in the wreckage of the buildings that once stood in the area.
Greenpeace and allied groups called on the IDF to remove the ceasefire-line posts, because the posts can confuse the mating rituals of species that rely on yellow plumage and coloring to gain the attention of the opposite sex.
"The fauna inhabiting the Gaza Strip rubble must not be disturbed," explained Greenpeace representative Chaya Tassadeh. "The callous distribution of yellow markers disrupts the environment and life cycle of numerous important species. The IDF must at once cease its disruptive operations and allow the ecosystem, already ravaged by conflict, to recover."
Ms. Tassadeh declined to specify what threatened fauna inhabit the rubble. "Does it matter?" she bristled. "Why does the specific species even matter? Are some animals more important than others? Why are you defending a genocide? I mean another genocide?"
Other environmental organizations seconded the notion. "Preserve first and ask questions later," admonished Sierra Club activist Ido Latree. "Our friends in Gaza tell us that Israel has massacred hundreds of thousands of innocent pregnant animal journalists. They cannot be trusted with the welfare and fate of the precious fauna along the ceasefire line. The IDF must pull out entirely, and preferably leave the Middle East altogether, just to be sure."
Ideally, added Latree, the environmentalist community seeks a return of the region to its natural state, which most major organizations understand to mean "under Islamic rule," despite Islam's role as an invasive species starting in the seventh and eighth centuries. "Sure, most species 'invaded' somewhere at some point," he acknowledged. "But we simply can't reset everything. Only some things. And if there's anything humans have demonstrated, over and over again, that they like reversing, it's the safety of Jews in their midst, or not in their midst. Or wherever. That seems to be the natural state of affairs, and humanity should strive to restore nature as much as possible."
The environmentalist NGOs have also allied with other progressive groups to demand that Israel allow materials to enter Gaza so that the local fauna can rebuilt the subterranean habitats that Israel so callously destroyed during the war.
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