Before 2018, I struggled with my weight. I was super fit in high school as I had trained daily in martial arts from the age of 6. This all changed when I became an adult, secured full time employment and started eating for comfort. I soon went from a size 8 or 10 (depending on the make of the clothes) to a size 16-18. I struggled with this battle for many years. I went on fad diets, tortured my body with extreme programs, and forced myself into the body I wanted without any self love involved.
On the 1st of January 2018 I was a size 16 in top and pants and an 18 in bras and dresses. By the 1st of May 2018 I was still at this weight but something deep inside me shifted. I changed my paradigm. There is a famous quote that says in order to achieve something you have never achieved before, you must be willing to do things you have never done before. On the 28th of May 2018 when I got the keys to my own place, I made a decision, an affirmation, a promise to myself that this time I will focus on releasing weight (not losing it, as you often find what you lose) through self love, care and kindness to my body doing things that make me happy and eating clean, fresh, vibrant food that makes me smile looking at it.
As of the 1st of August, I am now very comfortable in size 12 clothes. Dropping 2 dress sizes in 2 months is a wonderful feeling. And the best bit? I didn't focus on hating my body or making sure I counted calories. I merely did the things I loved doing, got plenty of fresh air, listened to what my body needed in terms of fuel - not what it was craving as your body craves what it has most and then I turned my love inward. It may sound a little far fetched and I still have some work to do in this area, however, I chose to love myself. Being forgiving of myself when I made a poor choice or an easy choice, treating myself and my body with respect and the kindness it deserves, focusing on releasing fears and other emotions that no longer serve me and by learning to accept my past but let go of it. It isn't who I identify with anymore.
Love yourself first. Only then will others be able to love you.
