I don't remember exactly where and when this happened, but I remember being at a gathering at a self-development retreat and overhearing one of the participants making a statement to the effect of "feeling frustrated by how many people sidestep having to actually DEAL with their histrionic drama by labeling it as CREATIVE PASSION."
The statement resonated with me back then — more than a decade ago — and continues to resonate, to this day.
Being "Out of Control" is NOT "Passion!"
Mrs. Denmarkguy — who's both a counselor, spiritual coach and minister — deals with this issue with many of her clients, too.
But the thing is, taking a chaotic out-of-control life filled with sketchy habits and behaviors, putting some shiny paper and a bow on it and declaring "I'm just a very passionate person!" does not make it so.
You may be a passionate person, but that doesn't give you a "hall pass" to engage in behavior patterns that scatters chaos and confusion onto everyone around you, within a two mile radius.
There are lots of truly passionate and creative people who's lives are not a perpetual cloud of chaos and disorganization.
Just... Don't Be Shitty!
Occasionally I've mentioned a friend of ours we've been helping because she's battling cancer.
Well, a different mutual friend promised to drive our friend to her chemotherapy appointment. She knew about this, a week in advance... and yet, when the day came, she not only "forgot" to set her alarm, then arrived late, then had forgotten to put gas in her car... and didn't have any money, so our cancer-afflicted friend had to pay for the gas.
Then — at the appointment — she practically had a shouting match with the physician's assistant over the timing of the chemo treatment.
On the way home "C" (our chaotic friend) felt compelled to stop at the supermarket to "pick up a couple of things," and then emerged 40 minutes later with two weeks' worth of groceries (which she had written a check for, even though she had no money) while our post-treatment cancer sufferer waited in the car... and all she wanted was just to go home.
As our friend said when we spoke yesterday: "Riding with C was far more stressful and exhausting then getting chemo."
Boundaries, Enabling and Reality
Maybe we all have examples of "that kind of person" in our lives, and maybe we tend to give them a free pass when they start in on their long line of rationalizations about how difficult it is to live as a "creative" or "passionate" person.
I know I have been guilty of enabling such people, finding that it is just too much work to argue with them and face their veritable barrage of excuses... let alone trying to sway their perception of reality to include them as being at the root of many of their troubles... and the deep sighs of some of those around them who find themselves in the middle of another round of "here we go again...!"
Of course, objective self-examination is not easy, by any figment of the imagination... and often people choose to live a messy life they know, rather than face the demons that are the root cause of that messy life!
Thanks for reading!
(Another #creativecoin creative non-fiction post)
Have any chaotic people in your life? People who — perhaps — write off their "messiness" by calling themselves "passionate?" Comments, feedback and other interaction is invited and welcomed! Because — after all — SOCIAL content is about interacting, right? Leave a comment-- share your experiences-- be part of the conversation!
(As usual, all text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is original content, created expressly for this platform.)
Created at 20200115 14:18 PST
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