I'm not much of a cook; I can do it of course but I lack the passion for it so my cooking tends to be rather simplistic. I'm a more passionate eater than cook - Might as well stick with one's strengths right?
I can throw burgers and steaks on the grill, make a pretty good home made pizza, scones, basic pasta dishes, breakfast foods, sandwiches, cold-cuts and cheese-platters and stuff like that. I don't get very creative...I'm a basic dude, make basic food in a basic way and that's about it. Basically.
The antithesis [that means total opposite] of a basic cook is 
She's not a fussy or pretentious cook, but surely is a thoughtful one who not only cooks well, but thinks creatively, isn't afraid to try new things and truly considers the ingredients and how they'll go together from a taste, texture and colour perspective. She thinks stuff through start to finish, ensures everything compliments and works with the other ingredients, thinks about how the flavours will come together when eaten and presents it well on the plate - A pretty critical factor I'd say.
It's clear she loves cooking and presenting food. I'd like to have the chance to taste her fare - Something tells me I'd be happy to do so and would ask for seconds; I'd set the table and do the clearing up also because that's only fair, and polite right? I'm happy to earn my place at her table. But why talk about Jaynie on my post? Yeah, good question.
Got no balls
Here's why...A while back Jaynie and I were talking about food and generally just picking on each other's nationality with good-natured rivalry when the legit meal of fish fingers came up in conversation - It seems her son and I both have a love of this tasty food...It doesn't matter that he's eleven and I'm fifty one...Fish fingers are a legit meal for any age..Everyone knows that! Besides, I'm a big kid mostly so it works pretty well.
Anyway, I made mention of my love of fish fingers on toast covered in tomato sauce [ketchup] and she told me, Jude loves them with Mrs. Ball's chutney on them.
I was like...Mrs. Ball's...WTF! Saffers, and their weirdo stuff, am I right?!
Of course Jaynie proceeded to tease me for being Australian and not knowing about this legit Saffer product and tell me how legit Mrs. H.R. Ball's chutney actually is. She gave me a few basic ideas on how it is deployed in her cooking then picked on me some more because I'm Australian. It totally sucks to be me and have no Mrs. Ball's it seems.
Ah yes...Well, it might seem that way to the uninitiated, that the G-dog is ball-less...But in actual fact that's not true at all. You see, thanks to one of the big national supermarket chains here in Australia I do indeed have balls...Mrs. Ball's original recipe chutney that is!
Apparently one must skud die bottel. This means to shake the bottle of course - Come on, who wouldn't want to shake Ball's right?! Seriously, as if people need to be prompted.
Here's the historical bit
From the Mrs. Ball's original recipe chutney website.
Back in 1852 a ship wrecked off the cost of East London, South Africa - The SS Quanza, enroute to Australia from Canada. Fortunately the Captain and his wife rescued the recipe for this legit chutney from the wreck. In 1865 it was passed on to Amelia, their daughter, who then married a bloke called Hebert Ball. See how it all comes together?
By 1914 demand for the chutney was increasing and a more commercial operation was established and until 2013 it was still family owned. It commands near legend-status in South Africa these days apparently but this shipwreck story makes me think...
...The ship was on the way to Australia...So, had it not wrecked off the coast of South Africa, the recipe for Mrs. Ball's original recipe chutney would have come to Australia and not been South African at all! Hmm, just pointing it out is all...Jaynie! Further to this...It was en-route from Canada so is it really Canadian? There's many many inconsistencies here methinks. But let's just assume it's South African until the truth is finally revealed.
Here's a close up of my recently purchased Ball's. You can see the Ball family crest at the top of the label and read the ingredients here.
Eating Ball's
The website shows many recipe's incorporating the chutney, and their other products, as an ingredient and it seems to be quite versatile adding flavour and body to various dishes. Jaynie cooks with it a lot and says it's lekker y'all. Not her exact words at all, but something to that effect.
Considering I'm not much of a cook I'm unlikely to use it in that way and will probably end up deploying her son's fish finger and Mrs. Ball's meal concept. It just seems so much easier and Jude is a smart kid so yeah, I'm happy to follow his lead.
I also plan to try it on buttered bread with cheese, otherwise known as a sandwich, because when I was in the UK I got addicted to their grated cheese and chutney sandwiches. I also happen to know that my basic culinary skills can handle that recipe with no problems at all. So, that's my two recipe options to start - Who knows where it'll lead from there?
At the time of writing this post I haven't yet eaten Ball's but it's probably going to happen relatively soon and I'll possibly report in on the taste of Mrs. Ball's in a follow-up post. In fact, I'll probably attempt a Jaynie-style cooking blog showing the process of crafting a grated cheese and Mrs. Ball's sandwich. Don't worry, I'll keep it rather basic and non-technical so everyone can follow along and learn how to make it for themselves.
I'm pretty happy to have Ball's, I mean I'd not feel completely right if I didn't, and I'm looking forward to trying out a couple recipes with Ball's in it; The sandwich and pouring it on fish fingers I mean. I know I can get more recipes on the website but if there's any South African's out there with some good, totally bloody simple Mrs. Ball's chutney uses and recipe's please feel free to comment below and let me know. Just remember I'm simple and basic, and Australian, so go slow or I just won't keep up.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind
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