Serendipity

I've been creating a new reality for myself over the last several weeks as my existing one wasn't quite resonating with me. It was a situation I found untenable and after many years of accepting it I finally decided to deal with it, cast aside the doubt and fear of a potential new reality and move forward. It's often best to do so before allowing the situation to fester and resentment build I think. So the new reality deployed and if you're keen you can read about it here.

Today I came home early from work and after a post-work snack of a few cheese and crackers I changed into my hiking gear and pulled on my boots with the intention of heading across the road for a hike. It was 1527 so I figured I'd get almost couple hours in and would arrive back home as it became fully dark. Great. I headed to the door and...

...I'd left my phone on my home office desk. That's the new reality I've been working on. I don't take my phone everywhere because It's bloody annoying and I don't need it. But here's where things get interesting; something made me go back for the phone. I don't know what the reason was, certainly no conscious thought, and it was odd because I've come to not miss the phone over the last several weeks, and have simply gotten used to being without it. Anyway, I went back, slipped the phone into my pocket and went hiking.

I'm not one to sit around waiting for contact from people but I've so desperately craved contact from one particular person lately that it's distracted me from most other things. The contact hasn't come though and I've been left to deal with it; I'm reasonable at dealing with most things but this was different; I needed to know this person was ok, but never got the message.

Anyway, I was hiking; Partially blue skies, birds, green trees and grasses everywhere I looked...Cold, but still pleasant. The gravel crunched beneath my boots and the thoughts of the day, the swirling stuff that spins like a vortex in my head were slowing, melting away and then, bing bing bing; the message notification on my phone.

I ignored it. It can wait; I'm hiking. It was 1546.

I walked on, turning to head up the hill and the more challenging part of the hike. Damn it, I better check that message I thought considering I'd be pushing it pretty hard up the hill and didn't want to stop. It was 1548.

It was the message I had so craved for weeks and I stopped dead still.

I read the message three times almost not believing it was there. It was though, and I responded. A casual response, polite but one I knew hoped would convey my concern, care and gratitude. It was 1550.

I kept walking making my way up that hill my step a little lighter, my heart too. There were a couple more messages and at 1604 the last message came in; it was a polite goodbye, have a nice afternoon sort of message. I responded, pressed send and resumed my hike with a smile on my face. It was 1607.

Just before continuing I snapped the image you see at the top of the post...It's where two trails fork and head in different directions. It seemed poignant that it was at the fork in the trail when that final message came in and I replied. Two people going in different directions just as the path did...But I guess in truth it's not so. There was, and is, connection and that's something right? I like to think it.

Sometimes paths parallel one another, converge, diverge, go on a tangent, get rough or smooth, become indistinct and even meet road blocks and dead ends. It's the same with relationships I guess and as humans we just have to accept that as difficult as it may be. I'm not a give in or give up sort of guy though; capitulate isn't in my vocabulary but I've had to accept certain realities...But then...The message. I know, just a message, but in truth much more than that also.

I don't know what made me take my phone today when I hiked as I normally would not have done so. The universe? Nope, I don't think so. Coincidence? Maybe. Hope? Nah, how could I hold that after so long but...I took it and there was the message. Serendipity.