G`day folks, one of the things that scares me the most has to do with depression. Especially because it is often difficult for me to identify if I am sad, or I am depressed.
Talking about depression is also talking about poorly channeled anger.
It is difficult to talk to my friends and family about it, sometimes I think it is better not to do it, because they do not understand, I imagine that by not seeing something tangible or something physical in a visible way, they cannot understand either It is very frustrating it is very macabre to believe, that someone uses these arguments to victimize themselves and the worst always the others between the lines assume that you are lying.
So when I feel so vulnerable, my response is "I'm fine" and that's if it satisfies them., in some cases it is lack of empathy, in others it is lack of knowledge regarding mental health. A lot of myths.
I always say I'm fine, but it's not the truth, true
If we are depressed it is because we are full of anger, hatred, spite, and all those negative things go inside and affect us, eat away at us. So, that's why we get sad, we don't get frustrated, we don't want to do absolutely anything.
And many times we fall into a state of physical and mental decay, emotional heaviness, inexplicable sadness, inappetence for the things that used to excite me, that is, legally being in mode without wanting to do anything.
It's an anger, a poorly channeled rage, but we feel it as a sadness, and we don't want anything with life.
But many times, deep down, it's not depression in itself, although it might seem, it's anger, but a very big, very deep, very deep anger, that I've kept to myself, I don't know why, but I do it... And boom!, I explode like a helium balloon.
My best friend who is a health professional, is a doctor, recently told me after telling her how I was feeling with the return to the sun, this month is my birthday and I climb another step, step.
The inexorably passage, of time sometimes scares us, that's why we have to fill the time doing things to our liking, that's how love, marriage, work, family, everything evolves, and that with age expectations should be realistic, hahaha because the hormonal decline is felt even in the hair. And that I do a lot of exercises, yoga and blah-blah-blah ,
In the end it's not bad or good because I'm human. Thanks to my husband, who is always by my side; to have someone who is there despite the changes unconditionally, minimal, is admirable.
I thank my friend, for encouraging me and relieving me with her comment, to channel grief, sadness and anger, and not stick her finger to make her bleed...
Janitze.
Any images in this post are taken with my iPhone 12, the Infinix pro-note 30 or with the camera eighties Rolleiflex 2.8 f, and edited with Canva
Icons by: Icofinder
Separator made with Canva by
Translation with |DeepL