New Year, Old Goals (and a Bit of Reality)
Hi folks.
A different post today for the new year — not a painting and not an art post. Perhaps i should have painted. might have taken less time.
This one is a bit more pensive. A talky-talky post about life in general, and my journey back toward the trim size and health I was in around February 2020.
This isn’t a silly New Year fad that flares up in January and disappears by February. But the new year does tend to bring reflection, whether we like it or not.
And for me, that reflection keeps circling back to a few big themes:
- Gym – “eat protein, lift heavy stuff”
- Snacking & appetite – hello GLP-1 agonists
- Sorting out years of poor nervous system regulation
- Diastasis recti from growing delightful humans
So let’s unpack that im not going to totally winge here... there will be a bit of interesting info i think... but here we go... im in a writing mood. Talking about Historical views of beauty, the impact of Covid and the uprising of GLP 1 Agonists.
The Gym Bit: Protein and Heavy Things
The core of my approach is boring and effective:
Eat enough protein.
Lift heavy things.
Repeat consistently.
Not cardio-until-you-die. Not starvation. Not punishment.
Protein matters in your 40s (especially as a woman), muscle loss accelerates if you don’t actively fight it. Muscle is metabolically active tissue — it helps with insulin sensitivity, resting energy expenditure, joint stability, posture, and frankly… feeling capable in your own body. This has not been my problem. I HAVE MUSCLES hiding in here... they are just surrounded in too much fat.
Lifting heavy doesn’t mean bodybuilding comps. It means progressive overload — challenging muscles enough that they adapt.
This part I understand well. It’s not new to me.
I mean i AM educated in this area...
The COVID effect.
So i hate bringing up covid, all the conspiracy theorists and idiots do a good enough job driving panic at every turn so ill not linger tooo much on this. Please note... im not mentioning it to start a covid comments war here. I'm not into that.
Basically i had my second baby in 2019. And went back to the gym afterwards. I had a difficult pregnancy nearly died (was in ICU with Pneumonia while pregnant) and it was a rough trip. So went back to the gym.
The dodgy trainer:
So i had a bad start there, was given a "trainer" (what a joke) who i said that i wan'ted to be back sub 60kg by xmas 2019, and i had diastasis recti and was not allowed to do insert list of exercises. she was really negative and 1/2 way through out first training session when she said that i COULD NOT LOOSE BABY WEIGHT WITH OUT DOING HEAVY STOMACH CRUNCHES and i would NOT be sub 60kg by xmas... i walked out. Im a polite person but i was like....yeah .... nah....
in came COURTNEY!!! a young vivacious little girl, who was the best trainer i ever had. I smashed it... and november came rought and i hit the sub 60KG goal. It was massive. i was lean, strong, fit, healthy and felt wonderful... this was xmas of 2019 - going in to 2020. So only 3 months after hitting my goal COVID HIT. Gyms shut. I tried to work at home but
ROLL IN 2020
i am AN ICU NURSE. I ended up working in a COVID ICU UNIT.
This was pretty crappy can i just say rewarding but crap.
that meant that with all the negativity, crap talk, fear and awfulness of Covid.... i was one of the ones inside a boiling coverall suit working with patients who were all dying from Covid. Every day. Covid death. Covid dying. no meal breaks (was too scared to eat in the breakroom anyway) pressure sores from masks. Pure exhaustion. no breaks. And all the while people whinging about Covid. AGain i'll not linger here, it was dreadful for EVERYONE. Im not saying i was worse... but when you have a bereft family member try and SPIT IN YOUR FACE telling you that you are lying to them that there is no such thing as covid and their "loved one" is not dying from covid because it doesn't exist... (meanwhile you nearly peed your pants looking after them, didnt get a break and have a presure sore on your face). Anyway it was shit.
I came home and all i could manage was crap food and put feet up and watch TV and scrub the house.
some days i was so tired i considered taking off my big mask in a ventilated room and spraying myself with the ventilator so i could catch covid and go home for 2 weeks... Alas that did NOT happen
Anyway the work all undone... all back on. gyms still shut and i was exhausted and burnt out and didn't care anymore.
Not going into it... but the weight back on. I have done a good bit earlyer in the year, but not back on struggle street after an injury undid it again...
Snacking, Hunger, and GLP-1 Agonists
The Obesity Thing (Let’s Just Say It Out Loud)
The obesity epidemic… let’s be blunt here and call a spade a spade.
I carry too much weight.
And zooming out from me for a moment — the numbers across the developed world are staggeringly high. The health disadvantages of this (not to mention the cost to the healthcare system) are equally staggering. No matter where you live.
From a historical point of view, **obesity **— or at least chubbiness — used to be a sign of wealth. It meant you had money and means. You could store food over winter, buy it when needed, and you didn’t have to fight hand and tooth for every meal. The poor peasants were the underweight and malnourished ones.
Fast forward to the modern Western world and the roles are largely reversed.
Those at the bottom are often the ones struggling to buy and cook fresh food, while being absolutely inundated with calorie-dense, hyper-palatable foods that are cheap, easy, and everywhere. Add modern convenience, sedentary lifestyles, and the fact that none of us have to murder a poor wildebeest for dinner, and for the most part we’re looking at a very clear calories-in / calories-out problem layered on top of biology and environment.
None of this is controversial. It’s just fact.
My hypothesis — and I’m fairly sure we’re already here — is that we’re swinging the other way entirely. We’re entering a period where it’s the wealthy who are thin, fit, and “healthy”, because they can afford the lifestyle that supports it, while many others are left behind, unable to keep up.
And before anyone starts: yes, of course there are thin poor people and overweight wealthy people. I’m talking population averages and statistics, not outliers. If you want to argue that point, come see me again after a medical degree and a solid statistics course looking at Western populations.
Which brings us neatly to the next development…
Enter prescription weight-loss medications.
I’ll talk about those below — but again, they represent another pressure point, because many of the people who could benefit the most simply can’t afford them, depending of course on where you live.
So have i started these, no. No yet. I have done lots of work myself and promptly yo-yoed around due to snacking and i am sorry to say Covid.
GLP-1 agonists work by mimicking the hormone glucagon-like peptide-1, which:
- Slows gastric emptying
- Increases satiety
- Reduces appetite and food noise
- Improves insulin response
They’re not magic, and they’re not for everyone — but they’ve forced an overdue conversation around why some people struggle so much with hunger regulation, despite doing “all the right things.”
For me, the interest isn’t about taking a shortcut. It’s about acknowledging that constant snacking and food noise aren’t always a moral failure or a willpower issue — sometimes they’re hormonal, neurological, or stress-driven.
I KNOW what to do... and when i do it it works well. I am a prime canditate for these medications. I am over 40. overweight, with a fairly active gym lifestyle for my overweightness, i am knowledable about diet and calories and macros... i just snack. i eat too much around the sides. i eat lots of veges and lean proteins... and then have 2 glasses of wine and cheeswe while cooking dinner.
Which brings me to the bigger, messier part…
Nervous System Chaos (The Bit No One Talks About)
Years of sympathetic nervous system dominance will absolutely wreck your body.
Always “on.”
Always alert.
Always braced.
That stress response doesn’t just live in your head — it lives in your breathing, your gut motility, your blood sugar control, your pelvic floor, your sleep, and your recovery.
You can eat well and train hard, but if your nervous system never drops into rest-and-digest, progress stalls. I m sure this is a big hit for me...
This is the unsexy work:
I would much rather lift 200KG at the gym that sit on the floor for 5 mins of breathing lol
- Breath retraining
- Parasympathetic activation
- Learning how to downshift
It’s slow. It’s subtle. And it matters.
Apparently. So ive been "eductating" my husband about it all... lol lol
Not a Resolution. A Reset.
So no, this isn’t “new year, new me.”
It’s:
- Doing what ive done before... again...
- Calmer nervous system
- Better boundaries around food
- Muscle instead of fat
- Health that actually supports life
and maybe less wine...
Slow. Intentional. Sustainable.
No drama. No panic. Just showing up and doing the work.
If you’re on a similar path — or quietly thinking about it — you’re not alone.
Here’s to consistency, not perfection.
anyway BACK TO PAINTING NEXT POST.... YIKES
Happy New Year
BLINGIT
