There are times in our lives when everything just don't go according to how we want it. It's like all these hardships and tough trials just piled up on us, and there seems to be no way to stand up again.
It feels worse when we cannot feel any helping hand at all, those people are suddenly nowhere to be found right at the time when we need them. Those people we expect to share the burden with us, or even just listen to our lamentations, are suddenly out of the scene.
It is so difficult trying to be strong, enduring all these overwhelming burdens alone, because we think we'd just be disappointed when we try to ask for help. But we attempt to survive each day, not really sure if we should feel thankful or not, because everyday is like a living hell anyway. It's exhausting to pretend like we are superheroes that do not have limits. Brothers, and sisters, we get tired, too. We get sick of life, too. And there were times we often wonder, what's the sense of living if I'd just experience all this hardest things, anyway? Am I just put here so the destiny could make fun of me, while witnessing me tortured every day?
You maybe undergoing some tough time right now. And you've doing your best to just bear with it everyday. I don't know if you've been crying every night before you sleep. Or if you have multiple thoughts of just ending it all, in an unthinkable way. Everything you do is always brought down by fate. You always fail. You always get rejected. No one is on your side.
Here is what I want to tell you. You are not alone. It maybe so hard and impossible to believe, but it is real. I know, you might raise your eyebrow right now that I seem to spit ridiculous stuff, but please trust me this time.
I won't say those problems won't get at you and you should see it as nothing.
This forced positivity does not work sometimes, and can even seem stupid at some point. Why? Problems are problems. They are called as that, because their purpose is to bother us. To make us worry every night and day, to prevent us from being happy. Even if we try to remove a chunk of our brain (this is the stupidest thing I said today), we will always think of our problems. Not being bothered by problems can also indicate escaping from it. Solving dilemmas starts from knowing it and its root cause. We don't just shove it to the back of our heads and just expect it to fade on its own. We always gotta do something. And cheer up? Yeah, maybe, but lemme tell you, it's better when we cry it out. Sometimes, just letting all those anxiety, and frustrations out does an amazing thing already. So, you can smile even when you don't feel like doing it, as science says it can lift your mood a bit; however, cry when you feel like crying. Don't bottle it up inside. It may ruin you someday.
I have also learned that God did not promise us a life full of rainbows and blessings, like when we pray for a house and car, these would just be dropped from above. No, it is not like that. If that's the case, would we even bother serving Him? We can just get what we want anyway, right?
God allows us to experience hardships, to remind us that we need Him. We can't do this on our own, but we have God that is always willing to fight the battle for us. He is our home, our refuge, and our Father who loves us dearly. who You are.."