Today watched Anaconda on my way home, recently decided to stop watching Youtube for some time and just watch more movies and series, sometimes I want to watch certain content and due to time constrictions I cant and the other night I wonder how much time I spend on Youtube daily, anyways this thing turned out way different than what I was expecting from those trailers that came out months ago, when I first saw the marketing material I thought we were getting another lazy reboot where Hollywood just tries to milk a franchise people remember from the 90s you know the whole JLo and Ice Cube thing where giant snakes ate people and it was kinda scary back then but does not really hold up anymore if you watch it today, but instead of going that route director Tom Gormican actually did something pretty wild with it, he made it a comedy where Jack Black and Paul Rudd play childhood friends who literally want to remake Anaconda themselves because it was their favorite movie growing up and they head to the Amazon to make it happen, well it was all based on a lie but still sounds stupid right like who would green light that idea but the thing is the movie knows exactly what it is and it leans into that whole meta thing where it makes fun of how studios reboot everything these days. The whole thing becomes this spoof of Hollywood and how they handle reboots and that is where the movie actually worked for me, I was laughing way more than I thought I would specially with Steve Zahn who was the funniest part of the whole damn thing. Sure the CGI on the anaconda looks like crap and the horror aspect is completely gone which might piss off people who loved the original franchise for the kills and the suspense, but if you go in expecting a fun time with some clever jabs at the movie industry you will probably walk out feeling pretty entertained, nothing groundbreaking but way better than what those trailers were making it look like.
- IMDB: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt33244668/
- Platform: PRIME VIDEO
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The setup is pretty straightforward when you break it down, Jack Black plays Doug who works as a wedding videographer in Buffalo making wedding videos and he is completely miserable doing it because he feels like he never met his full potential in life, his boss keeps telling him you are great at your job and you could end up with a B or even a B plus life which just sounds depressing. Paul Rudd plays Griff who moved to LA to become an actor but he is struggling hard, the movie opens with him trying to get through one line of dialogue as a background actor and he cannot do it so he gets fired on the spot which was funny. Then you got Thandiwe Newton playing Claire who is a lawyer going through a divorce because her man left her for his dental hygienist, and Steve Zahn plays Kenny who is the dumbest one of the group and an alcoholic but he says he is sober well Buffalo sober which means just beer and wine and some of the lighter liquors. When they all get together in Buffalo, Griff surprises them by saying he got the rights to remake Anaconda which sounds completely fake but everyone believes him because they are all desperate for something to change in their lives. They pool their money together and somehow scrape up funding going from millions to a few thousands budget, the most they could get a loan for was $9k, the acting is just hilarious, then they head off to the Amazon to make their movie without any kind of filming permits or legal paperwork which is crazy considering Claire is supposed to be a lawyer but nobody thinks about any of that stuff, the movie does a decent job showing how Doug's wife played by Ione Skye is actually supportive telling him you should do this I can tell you lost your fire and here is an opportunity which was nice to see.
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Once they get to the Amazon things start getting chaotic real quick, they hire this snake handler named Santiago played by Selton Melo who has an anaconda they are going to use as a prop but Paul Rudd is terrified of snakes. They try to shoot their first scene with the Anaconda and Griff keeps getting closer to the snake and freaking out until he finally throws it overboard and the snake gets caught in the blades of the motor and gets torn to pieces which was brutal but I couldnt stop laughing, Santiago is heartbroken and they have a funeral for the snake which was both sad and funny at the same time but that night Santiago and Griff decide to hunt for another Anaconda both almost drunk and Santiago gets eaten by a real huge Anaconda. Then they decided to go after him and thats when they meet the illegal gold miners who protect their territory and go after them but this woman named Ana played by Daniela Melchior who at first seems like she is running from bad guys but it turns out she is actually the bad guy, she is doing illegal gold mining too and the people chasing her are cops trying to arrest her so it was kind of confusing at first who where the good guys. The whole Ana subplot felt pretty unnecessary to me because it never really connects with the main story in any meaningful way, she ends up joining their group and Doug even starts focusing more on her character in their movie which creates friction with Griff. While they are floating down the river on their boat they see this huge yacht with a film crew behind it and it turns out to be Sony actually making a real Anaconda reboot, that is when everyone realizes Griff lied about having the rights and never had permission to make this movie in the first place which should have been obvious from the start but again these characters are all idiots so it makes sense they did not figure it out sooner, its funny how a girl on Sony's boat make jokes about how everyone is out of ideas so decide to reboot a stupid movie from the 90s.
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The movie really picks up in the second half when the giant anaconda shows up and starts killing people, the snake destroyed Sony's yacht and killed their whole crew so now it is coming after the main characters. The snake attacks and kills Ana after she reveals her true colors and holds the group at gunpoint trying to force them to carry the gold for her, but the Anaconda jumps from the water and she gets dragged underwater which was a deserved ending for a character that never really fit into the story anyway, the time span she was on the movie was very little and meant nothing but still I get what type of movie is this so I was like meh dont care. Griff leaves the group after arguing with Doug about the whole lying situation and goes to join the Sony crew but he arrives too late because the anaconda already wrecked everything and killed most of them. Eventually they all end up at what looks like a filming location which is Sony's setup for their version of Anaconda, and who do they bump into but MF Ice Cube at the very last minute while they had the real Anaconda about to snatch them, he start shooting flares just as in the original movie until got the thing to run back. He saves them and then says I cannot stay with you because I have to go save JLo and Eric Stoltz which was a great callback to the original, the whole meta thing where they acknowledge the first movie exists and these characters are in that universe was clever even if it did not make total sense logically because if Sony is making a reboot why would the original cast be there.
The ending of the movie is a very classic one with the group surviving the snake attack and then getting approached by Jennifer Lopez herself who shows up as a cameo at the very end, she tells Doug she saw their unofficial remake footage and wants him to direct and he just past out but the fact that there is this scene where Santiago survive might be an indication that they going for a sequel, I wouldnt mind if they stay as a comedy. The movie works really good when its all about friendship and they stay together being silly and bouncing off each other, Jack Black does his usual Jack Black thing which is why he is a star and Steve Zahn steals every scene he is in playing this lovable dummy who cannot pee in front of people which becomes a running gag. Paul Rudd feels a bit wasted here because he gets outshines by Black and Zahn, his character uses a toothpick as a signature thing in the movie within the movie and that was really stupid, there is also the inception feel of a movie within a movie that work out great, something that is not very common. Thandiwe Newton does not have much to do either, she is basically just there to be the romantic interest for Paul Rudd and her character does not have any real personality beyond I am divorced and available which is a shame because she is a talented actress who deserved better material, she almost feel like background. The CGI on the anaconda looks pretty bad but you wont really care about it because the comedy aspect and story telling takes over and puts everything else action related in the background, I think that might be intentional since the whole movie is supposed to be this silly comedy and not a serious creature feature. If you go in expecting an action pack horror movie or something on that level you will be disappointed because that is not the intention of this movie, but if you just want to watch Jack Black and Paul Rudd goof around in the jungle for 90 minutes you will probably have a decent time with it, its a fact you are going to end up laughing hard, I was watching this thing on my way home laughing while on the train and walking home. I would give this movie a solid 7 out of 10, it is fun enough and has some legitimately action moments but it also feels kinda shallow and does not really earn its existence beyond being a joke about Hollywood reboots, the movie works when it goes all out into the stupidity and stops trying to say anything meaningful about filming or making their movie any good, you can call this movie a good one time watch meme film.
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