This prompt is very timely for me. Last week I had to spend my week in hospital after suffering from some nerve damage. I have partially lost my eyesight, touch and balance. My situation was deteriorating initially and the doctors were worried my ability to breath properly would be compromised. As such, I was put on a ward for respiratory problems so that if my breathing was impacted, they could look after me better with the breathing equipment they had in the ward.
Luckily, for me, my situation stabilised and I am now seeing some small marginal improvements as I start my route to recovery.
There were some really sick patients in my ward. The man in the bed next to mine was in his 90s. He was ill with some breathing problems but he also had severe dementia. His wife came and visited him during the day but he didn't really know who she was. He didn't recognise any faces or really remember anything. He didn't know where he was, why he was there, or know where he had come from.
At night he shouted out in fear. "Help!", "Help!" It was very difficult to listen to. He was confused. He was in constant fear.
I lied there at night thinking, god if I get really old, I wouldn't want to lose my mind. What is the point of any existence when you don't know where you are or who anyone is?
As I spent my days there, I considered my own situation. Although my sight was damage and I could not move too well, I could read the text on my phone and use it to chat to people. That was my first blessing. Being able to interact and communicate with others is so important. We are social beings after all and with no social interactions, then what are we?
It made me think as I lay there, that even if things didn't improve for me, then I would be better than the man laid up next to me who had no meaningful interaction with the world around him.
It occurred to me then, that I would never want to lose my mind. If my body was a little bit damaged (as mine is still now), you can still have a reasonable quality of life. I am with my family, I can use my laptop, I can interact with people. Even if my body is behaving like that of a 100 year old man. My mind is young.
So this weekend's prompt is timely for me, It poses a question that I have been answering for myself during the last few days. I would never want to lose my mind.