Well, hello there!
Did you miss me? It has been a minute since we’ve seen each other, hasn’t it? There’s so much I need to tell you… so much to catch up on. Please have a seat.
Sweet green relish! What am I thinking?
I’ve been reading so much about Smart Alec Tees on the alter-ego’s account (
Alec, Resident Smart Ass.
Reporting for duty.
Take that any way you like… I don’t think there is a wrong way to interpret my professional title. All I can say for sure is that I am one highly intelligent donkey.
And let me say this once only: if anyone dares to call me a “noble steed”, I will hoof them in the rear-end. Mmkay? (I think we’re going to be the bestest of friends!)
I love long walks on the cart path, Alec Baldwin, God-awful film nights and singing sad ditties in the barn. I hate wearing clothes, but the stark irony of this fact only makes me a better clothing designer.
Because that's exactly what I do...
Smart Alec Tees Is Redefining Fashion.
A little bit of spice, a pinch of sugar, a squeeze of lemon... and seventeen boat-loads of #Hive! 🐝 (Too much spice, you're thinking... I know. You gotta trust me on this. I'm a genius.)
There is no debate about the main ingredient in this delicious equation though, right? I don't hear any complaining. It seems we're all here in the same place for the same reason...
Hive Makes the World Go Round!
And I'm here to make it better... obviously. What could possibly beat a talking donkey with an impeccable eye for fashion and a deadly sense of humor?! (Answer: absolutely nothing.)
But let's get serious for a hot second... we have actual, real, super-serious plans for this account and the Smart Alec Brand. Not all of it will be revealed here in this post, so you're going to want to stay tuned for updates in the near future.
IMPORTANT NOTE: When I say "we", I'm referring to myself and my pet humans (
)... we all know I'm the real star and the brains behind the Smart Alec Tees revelation, but I like having them close by... and Dave knows his way around a computer.
But I'm gonna trot past any further ado now... 'cause we're excited!
The Hive Plan:
1. COMMUNITY
2. ENGAGED CURATION
3. REINVESTMENT
That small, manageable list feels like a good place to start for this (re) #introduction post... just enough to give you an idea of the Smart Alec direction, and get this stone off to a rolling start!
So let me briefly explain each spoke of this wheel...
1. COMMUNITY
Smart Alec Tees is part of the #Hive family-- like it or not-- and we are here to make life in the ecosystem a more fun and rewarding experience! (I, Alec the Donkey, will do my best to make it happen anyway... I can't make any promises for my underwhelming human counterparts.)
So the store itself has MERCH for Hive lovers, obviously, and individual tribe enthusiasts... but you can also pay at the checkout with Hive, HBD and a selection of Hive Engine tokens-- thanks to 
Community curation for the brand account will be in a few areas: HUMOR is number one, Smart Alec brand love is a very, very close second, engaging with good introduction posts from Hive newcomers and random high-quality game and tribe content.
It's worth repeating that humor is number one... we're here to find some good laughs, and to make good people laugh. The Smart Alec clothing line may be serious business-- and I want our customers to be happy as pigs in poop-- but we're always looking for the lighter side.
It's a business first though, so it makes sense to swing the #entrepreneur stick while we're at it. Represent!
That means tribes like CTPTalk, HiveList and HiveMeme will be part of the Smart Alec plan... as well as communities like LOLZ, Comedy Open Mic, Pubs and Hive Hustlers. A good mix that makes sense while being careful not to lose focus and confuse followers.
2. ENGAGED CURATION
The first explanation covered the basics, so not much needs to be said. We want to laugh, roll out the welcome wagon for Hive newbies and show our love for general high-quality stuff... and Smart Alec groupies, of course!
So we'll be trolling our chosen haunts and topics for goodies to upvote and engage with. Nothing too complicated... tags like #lol, #meme, #funny and #introduction will be on the radar, and variations of these. Others may be added over time.
Collections of our favorite curated posts will also be a weekly ritual soon. Stay tuned! 📺
To find content about the Smart Alec Tees brand, we'll be watching these tags:
#smart-alec
#smart-ass
#smart-alec-tees
#smartalectees
Using any one of these, or tagging this account directly, should get our attention... we will always upvote, share and engage with quality content about the Smart Alec brand and products. Nothing makes a talking ass happier than meeting its biggest fans!
3. REINVESTMENT
This just means that we are committed to growing the value of the Smart Alec Tees account here on Hive... not only by retaining any rewards the account earns through its activity, but by also baking part of the store's profits back into the account pie.
Image c/o Towfiqu Barbhuiya on Unsplash.
The nuts and bolts of this idea will need to be worked out in more precise terms shortly-- plus more developments in this column down the road-- but I want the community to reap the benefits of any success Smart Alec Tees may experience by building a strong and dynamic account.
As a different type of reinvestment in the community, every post made from this account will include as beneficiaries all the accounts related to products in the store... the various game and tribe accounts I've used as design inspiration, of course, but also two Hivians whose graphics were used in product designs: 
The human founder,
That's a pretty good wide-angle shot of the Smart Alec fundamentals off the hop.
Was this post WAY longer than was first planned? Uh... yeah. Was it exceptionally intelligent for having been written by a cartoon donkey? I haven't decided if that question is offensive or not... but yes.
Affirmative. Alec: Clear for launch.
Everything you see in THE SHOP is ready for purchase and shipping... new items will appear as they are rigorously tested and approved (shoes, for instance).
And although some little things like descriptions are still being fine-tuned, Smart Alec Tees is open for business and will be more polished by the time you see the next post.
While we're on the topic of community and growth: the next post will include details for a PRODUCT GIVEAWAY. Forgive the tease... that's all the info you're getting for now. Follow along to find out more soon!
Smart Alec Tees merch is humbly powered by PRINTFUL. Dave builds his websites using Wordpress and WooCommerce, and he uses CANVA for most of his graphic designs. I highly recommend trying them out if you like to create things, or get in touch (