I'm old enough to remember when one could eat food without photographing it first - It sounds crazy but that's exactly how the world used to be in ye days of yore. Food would arrive at the table and we'd reach for the cutlery, not the phone. Ah yes, the olden days.
I'm not sure when the ritual of eating changed however these days it seems if one doesn't have a legit photo of the food posted to social media one simply cannot begin to consume it, and one's life and self-esteem is somewhat less than it could be of course.
I've seen people arrange the food on the table in a manner most appealing for whatever idiotic social-media they are going to upload it to; It looks so complicated!
It takes effort to project to the world one has the most amazing life, despite one being a train-wreck. Thanks to social media and smart phones we can all live amazingly perfect lives, or vicariously through someone else's life which must be way better than our own because look at that food! Our lives can present so immaculately despite the reality.
I eat a meal out every working day of the week; Breakfast or lunch. It involves rye toast, avocado, poached eggs, seared flesh in the form of bacon, croissants, toasties and various other things, in various combinations and shamefully I take photos sometimes. Just for my blog you know. Fuck! It hurts just admitting it!
Back in my idiotic days when I was on Facebook I used to see these plates of food pop up and think to myself, what the actual fuck is happening here, and why do I have to see it? It was one of the reasons I removed Facebook from my life and it's been the best move I made! Facebook is, quite literally, shit! [Insert your compelling reason for having Facebook here.] I know you have one.
I was recently on-chain commenting with 
I actually thought it was cool and commented that I used to do that on Facebook. All my food images were of plates of food after the food had been eaten! Crumbs, sauce, off-cuts and half-gnawed food was all you got...Oh, and a comment that said something like how good was this steak! I know, small things amuse small minds - I get it.
I suggested to Anna (from the sushi-plate debacle above) that someone should start a WHAT WAS ON YOUR PLATE community and she seemed to like the idea...Or maybe she was just humoring me and actually thinks it's the dumbest idea ever. Either way, I'm thinking about doing so because...Well I guess there's no reason other than why not?
The concept is simple. Post a picture of your plate after you've eaten the food with a comment saying what was on there, the same as one would with the image of the plate or meal prior to having been eaten. Yeah, I know it's such a dumb concept, but it's probably going to be a reality so you might as well get used to it. An example below.
How good is this bacon and eggs! #winning #bestlife #betterthanyours #notsetup #natural #yourlifesucks #mineisincredible #hashtag #foodies #consumerism #mentalhealth #cryforvalidation #sideboob #needrelevance #noonelovesme #imawesome #vegan #nogluten #almondmilk #prada #creditdebt #whyarentItheboss #influencer #handout #noeffort #whyme #onlyfans #twitbook #instaface #boobsout #yougettheidea
Of course, as you can see there's many appropriate #tags which must be #tagged to give the post #credibility and to lead #people into potential #liking the comment because that #like is critical to one's #self-worth and feeling of #importance and #validation.
Naturally no actual plates of food would be tolerated in the WHAT WAS ON YOUR PLATE community and the mute button would be used to good effect to ensure all posts were on-topic. Above you can see some food images that are completely not acceptable - All mine of course and yeah...Fucking hell G-dog, that's a lot of photos of food! #dontevencare #sheeple #wtf
The community wouldn't just be about empty plates
Empty coffee cups and glasses, milkshake cups, greasy hamburger wrappers and KFC boxes, pizza boxes with nothing but oil and melted cheese in there, sushi trays, take-out containers, empty chocolate bar wrappers, banana skins and fruit peels, empty cookie trays, peanut shells, even pots and pans used for cooking food and general food scraps could be included...The list is endless...All welcomed, as long as there's no actual food in it, or the food is smashed up, gnawed and pulverised after the eating or cooking process. Look out all you massive communities this one could be the next big thing!
Anyway, I'm throwing it out there, the concept, and quite possibly, most definitely, maybe, for sure will get it set up at some stage. I'm pretty sure the response will be just as massive as it has been for the three other communities I started a while ago which have done so well almost literally nothing. #communitiestothemoon #communitymeister
That's about it for now I guess...I'm off to plan the grand release of the WHAT WAS ON YOUR PLATE community - Dancing girls will dance, marching bands will play, champagne will fall from the skies and Brittney Spears will be doing a concert to kick it all off. The release-party will be the hottest ticket in town...No food selfies allowed naturally.
In the meantime though...It's ok to follow along with everyone else in society and take photos of your meal to demonstrate how awesomely lekker your life isn't is on social media. Who needs self-respect found from within and one's true achievements and actions? Who needs to take ownership and responsibility for their own feelings, attitudes and actions? #overrated #toohard Post an imaginary life on social media and you're gtg.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind
Discord: galenkp#9209