Even the greatest armies in the history of the world faced defeat's sometimes.
So how can we, fallible humans with all of our imperfections and frailties only ever expect to taste the sweet nectar of victory?
We cant, but of course we already know this don't we?
Let me back up for just a second and see if I can begin to explain where exactly I am coming from. I'm the guy who writes a couple of thousand words, explores an idea and whether the idea be positive, negative or indifferent, I usually find a way to leave you with a positive take or an optimistic spin on whatever the topic du jour is.
If you remember Jerry Springer, people of a certain age will have no issue recalling who this is, at the end of his show he always signed off with:
Jerry's final thought.
In this closing segment he would detail some of the most toxic traits of humanity, some of the most dysfunctional families and guests who had been on his show would be examined, dissected and classified, if possible Jerry would sum up and suggest an explanation for the way people are the way they are. Often there would be an analysis of some redeeming qualities that could perhaps be embraced and maybe, just maybe there was a chance for people or situations to become better than they were.
I remember a phrase that has always resonated with me, it speaks of the ability of humans to perhaps steal a victory from the jaws of defeat even when it seems all hope has fled. It encapsulates that rare and incredibly special potential for things to be better even when it seems that all hope is gone and the outlook is both nihilistic and defeatist:
Where there's life, there's hope.
Today I will not be signing off with my trademark spin-doctory. Today I will acknowledge that there isn't always a happy ever after to every chapter of the tale. Today I will write like a man devoid of hope, until the morning at-least when I will try and start all over again and aim for the highest virtues possible.
From waking today, I knew the day was going to be... Challenging, that's the politest way I can find of explaining it. I awoke 5.30 with a migraine, a poor way to start the day, but hey-ho, it could only get better right? 🤦♂️🤷♂️🤦♂️
15 minutes later while trying to throw a little sustenance down my neck, my dog Holly, who is utterly gorgeous but far too greedy for her own good, tripped me over as she was trying her damnedest to see what I was eating and got in between my feet before I had fully woke up.
The whole of my 'not insignificant' mass did what one would expect when gravity tries to teach us what happens when an ample body gathers momentum in a downward direction. I obviously did not want to crush Holly so twisted and flipped to change my angle of descent, long story short, my big toe that smashed down in to the floor and both my wrists hit the wooden floor, piledriver style and are still in a lot of pain right now at 11.20pm.
Let's gloss over the fact I had an epic coughing feet while brushing my teeth and move on. From leaving the road outside my house at the very beginning of my daily commute, there was issues, taxi cab that pulled out sharply in front of us from a blind junction, the wagon that drove at 1.2 miles per month and the temporary traffic lights at two... 'Count 'em' TWO points along my journey and it was not a fun, stress free drive to work. I didn't mention that I was running late due to my migraine, did I? Although I imagine you probably guessed it was a 'running late' kinda day.
When I got to work, the plan for Tuesday had been changed and my day was as bad as it could get, It started with a scalding hot hose pipe spraying back in my face (yup it had a leak) imagine the irony of this being on a surface in a zone that had sheet ice covering almost the entire floor. A colleague did have a fall prompting an investigation that was not at all conducive to us catching up, I did mention we started the day several hours behind, right?
I was resigned to how the day was going and knew I was just gonna have to grind out the 12 hours and get the hell outta there.
A few hours in I finally earned a break, whilst grabbing a well earned, strong black coffee or three I received a text message from my lovely lady saying ring me ASAP. Today we had tradesmen in our house fitting a new window where our kitchen/back garden door was and a new door where our window was. It seemed a sure bet that it was regarding this, it wasn't, although she did mention that the first tradesman had brought the wrong door with him... It figures!
The call was indeed regarding one of my children who was going through an incredibly difficult time emotionally. The problems that She was suffering with made me feel appalled that I didn't realise what was happening. I don't feel comfortable discussing them today as it is incredibly tender and to be honest there have been tears many tears at home. It was a horrific state of affairs and one of those things that as a parent you dread ever coming up and you always assume 'it's someone else's kid'.
Throughout the rest of the day when I only managed one full break due to several ongoing situations and stand-offs, many things that would normally have triggered me passed by in a haze as my day was already at rock bottom and had zero chance of coming back up again.
I actually feel as though I just worked out a massive amount of stress via my fingertips. So even though I am not going to sign off in a positive, upbeat, trademark 'me' kind of manner, where I detail the great unconsidered, hidden positive aspect of my day that was brought to light, I know you will forgive me and let me just let this one slip discreetly in to the annuls of history.
I want to be upbeat, I want to find some cool ways to tell you how it will all be better tomorrow, but although I didn't want any cheesy, crappy pics in this post, I'm goin gto sign off by reminding you of who I am...
I ain't special, I ain't a hypocrite, I am Just me!
Sometimes going to be is the only sensible thing to do at the end of the day. Maybe I will reflect more tomorrow, but for now I just wanna switch off my poor, tired, stressed head.
Thank YOU for taking the time to read my post and if you're one of those amazing people who like to hit the comments section... Then I doubly thank YOU!
Either way I want you to know that you are appreciated!
