Modern Marriage
Inspired by 
When we wanted to get married, it happened that the paper documents we had carried with us until then were no longer acceptable.
Even a birth certificate that had once been translated from a distant foreign country into the local language - and then got lost, if it ever had been there at all - needed to be confirmed again and the authorities demanded an original certificate.
My humble self, asking: "How is it that I can have a married past, when such a document left no doubt, but is now drawn exactly into the same?"
Answer: "The law has changed in the meantime. Once beyond doubt, it is now to be doubted. Nothing can be done."
How could I possibly prove that I am me and have always been me?
I said, "I've been in this country since the early seventies, they already let me get married a first time. And divorced! I have the documents of everything, one AND the other! It is really me, your Grace, believe me at last!"
But my Grace remained sceptical. It demanded further I-paper evidence. I circumvented the hurdle by asking other graces for their illustrious help, which eventually, by carrier pigeon delivery, sent a pardoned copy on its way.
All life certificates, finally and at last stamped and delivered! Hooray!
One must know as a common man that marriage is finally and always a cultic act.
To simply stroll into the illustrious rooms of the townhouse and expect a marriage would be sacrilege too much. And so we have humbly acknowledged that a certain amount of effort is well justified. Just imagine, one phone call would be enough, bang ! - an appointment made and bam ! married!
The graces on the high official chairs: They would have too little to do! No importance! Merely abused by the rank and file to get a spurned document handed over. Which then disappears into the depths of an obscure drawer. No! Not so, dear friends!
The document is everything, the person is nothing!
In a way, I feel so grateful. Over three long months went by to give this thing the reverence it deserved. What would we have felt without this challenge to our selves? Especially in these times of social warmth and closeness (ahh...) , wasn't it appropriate, wasn't it necessary, to give weight to the process?
Well... , yes. In a way.
That nice woman who served as our marriage servant, she did a really good job.
She even read a poem of great depth to us! I found that surprising and touching. A total stranger, she was to us. In an instant she became a human being who delivered to us the principles of love and tolerance. Was that bad? No.
I found this is what gave her meaning. Her profession was to be human, she obviously and deliberately undervalued the document-thing and lifted the relationship-thing up. I liked that. She transfigured the nuisances which took place beforehand into an experience which was worth the former efforts.
I know for sure that this woman wouldn't like to be replaced by a computer-ritual.
Not making it instant and easy but long term and difficult to finally get to her chamber of marrying couples.
The future enthusiasts may see it differently. Like so:
An artificial computer chip is inserted in every human being. All their data is stored on this microchip.
You want to marry, folks? No problem, just go online, click on what you desire and there you go! Within seconds your identity is confirmed, your status checked and you receive the transmitted allowance and confirmation for marriage all at once! No need for fleshy people involving themselves. A computer voice sings a song or recites a poem! Done! You're married!
All the rest is then also done for you. The taxation authority as well as all other insurances will be informed without you having to bother. Ain't that great?
But: People really cling to their fleshy appearances AND their physical jobs, don't they?
They make it extra complicated in order to feel that they are needed. That's one part. Which is not bad. The other part though obeys what is delivered to them as "the law". They like to work by the book. So they become extra extra complicit, for it seems to ensure their existence as a working entity. Not realizing, that working by the book finally and ultimately they themselves make it possible being replaced in their future lives.
How so?
When the book says that everything has to be digitized it creates a conflict in the peoples. On the one hand they want to meet physically and have a personal look at the documents, on the other hand they share the distrust in real people.
Which voice shall one listen to?
If they listen to their real selves they are going to ignore "the law". It arrives daily, or weekly or monthly as an update. People don't bother.
And that is something which bothers the control freaks. People are lazy and don't like to read long law texts. They find it easier to work on their own terms. Now, if everything is digitized nothing of this lazy behavior will be possible, no? Updates circumvent the human decision maker.
So both, the client, and the servant are then irrelevant.
They may tell you that from then on live will be oh so beautiful and effort-less. And indeed, no efforts needed. All will be decided for you by "THE CODE".
But people are funny, aren't they? They actually want to make an effort.
And, really, I try to think it through:
A chip like that in my flesh. I mean, wouldn't it have to be connected to the big mighty network? After all, you can't keep inserting it and then fumbling it out time and again, can you? So it needs a permanent online connection to the high artificial oracle.
And then: finally I would be human again! I could safely approach others, the oracle would immediately report whether it was a dangerous flesh-being or whether I could have sex without hesitation.
I would devote myself to the fine arts, would never again need to work regularly, would always be given food and drink, because I would be bursting with health, since I would find a nice medicine cabinet on every wall of the houses, which would inject me with free medicines directly intravenously.
In the cabinet sits a friendly little robotnik that connects to my ever-present cannula opening by means of a cute telescopic arm. Since my chip would sound an alarm if there were any alarming levels, such as when I needed to brush up on my vaccinations. I would then receive a sensory signal via a brain-synapse thingy.
My body, filled to bursting with all the yummy chemicals and genetic goodies, immune to really ANYTHING!
But wait a minute:
if we make so many trillions of people all so incredibly immune, healthy and happy, wouldn't our beautiful earth reach its limits? So say the fearful among the futurists.
And really, I have the solution:
in the end, it would all be a matter of luck. Fate, so to speak.
Whenever a person consults the medicine cabinet, the great random generator goes off in the background and one is injected with either a saline solution or a poison. After all, people will say at some point, life is always life-threatening, let's face it!
Of course, dear people, the poison would not work in an instant. What have you thought? Nohooo, it would work little by little as it would be a nasty thing when peoples drop dead on the ground. Nobody likes deaths on the sidewalks, that's for sure, no? It hurts our feelings and our sense for aesthetics.
We would pretend that it is an exciting lottery in which we, who love to linger around uncertainties - due to our innate inertia - indulge ourselves in the regular adventure. Til we believe it. You know ... first you fake it, then you make it-kind-of-thing.
Great artificial goodness! It's all going to be very exciting. Promise!
1st. Photo by James Orr on Unsplash
2.nd Photo by Nice M Nshuti on Unsplash