2014
Was a special kind of year for me. It was the year I graduated high school. It was also my last year of obesity. Graduating high school was a huge deal in my family, so I celebrated with a summer filled with multiple liters of soda, countless boxes of Costco Pizza, and several hours of Destiny on my PlayStation 4. That summer was a success in my eyes.
Fall came around I decided to not go to college, I did not feel prepared for that next step. I went to get myself a job at the age of 17. Not many places around me were hiring and I landed a job at TJMaxx. You would be correct if you guessed that I hated every minute of it. At TJMaxx I learned how cruel some people can truly be. Working in a retail clothing store I often offered my assistance to people who always seemed to turn me down. I would smile and their heads would shoot down to their phone as if they had received the most important text in the world. I was sick and tired of feeling ignored. It was hard not to see me but it seemed as if it was easy to avoid me. I would often dream of a world where I could make eye contact with someone and they would not turn their head away in disgust. Being obese felt like being a terms and conditions document. As soon as they saw me they were quick to skip past me.
December 1st, 2014
It was my birthday. My long awaited 18th birthday. As a teen this day seems monumental, you are told that when you reach 18 you are no longer a child. My first day as an "adult" I stepped on a scale to witness the true horror that was my obesity. That scale may have read 290 pounds but in my head it registered as failure. I tried to brush it off and went to work. I do not even remember what I worked on, I just remember thinking in my head how did I get here. What allowed me to become a 290 pound 18 year old. The numbers would not go away. I would think to myself
"I want to be skinny. I want it more than anything. I want to feel what it was like to not be stared at when trying to squeeze into a seat. How it would feel walking up stairs and not being out of breath. I want to wear a soccer jersey again. I want to going into a clothing store and being able to buy any shirt." Some of these things may sound simple but to me they would be life changing.
On my birthday I was just having a scream fest with myself in my head. Many people in high school said I would become that obese teacher everyone would laugh at or, the funny fat guy everyone keeps around to make them happy. They deemed me as a loser and I had for the most part agreed with them. There was always a part of me that felt like I was worth so much more. On this day it felt like I was fighting a constant battle within and I was forever lost.
Thankfully I went home and found a spark of inspiration. My niece, Ximena, was just a baby then. I remember I was holding her on my shoulder and smiling until I heard my mother mention my weight. It dawned on me that if I kept going I was not going to be able to see this little girl grow. I choked up inside imaging her never getting to know me because I passed away due to some terrible health conditions. Even worse what if she was to grow up in a world where her uncle was just a fat loser who accomplished nothing in his life. I searched deep within myself to understand why sitting on that couch was such a life changing moment. Either way I could not let this child down. In order for me to wish for her success, I needed to show her what success looked like. As she laid on my bright red XXXL sweater, I began to brainstorm what would soon become my weight-loss journey.
I remember waking up in morning and I looked in the mirror and said "It ends here." I wiped my tears and turned on some of my favorite inspirational music (I Wonder by Kanye West was and still is one of my favorite motivational songs). I jumped into the shower and I let the water pour over my head as I imagined what the impact would be if I achieved the unthinkable. In that shower as I rapped
You can still be who you wished you is, it ain't happened yet and that's what intuition is.
I promised myself that I would not let anyone, not even myself, prevent me from achieving this goal. The goal I set for myself was to weigh 200 pounds by the release of Marvel's Avengers: Age of Ultron on May 1st, 2015. The dream that was so farfetched became a reality in my head that day. I came out of that shower refreshed and ready for what was to come.
I went straight to the r/keto sub-reddit, a sub-reddit I had lurked for several years. I always visited that page to see the transformations and I would get so happy seeing those people change their entire lives for the better. Normally when I visited r/keto I would be there as an observer, someone who was just there to see the stories. This time was different. When I loaded that page I felt as if I was one of them. I had joined these lovely people on our mission to achieve what others deemed impossible. I read their FAQ, I searched through the sub, and I looked at the amazing progress pics. I have not had a bigger dopamine rush since that very day, the excitement was surreal.
December 12th, 2014
The first day on my new journey was a Friday. I went to work for my average four hour shift getting nothing but more disgusting looks from my favorite customers. After my shift I went to go eat a juicy double-double protein style cheeseburger from In-n-Out. I could not believe the keto diet would allow such a beautiful burger to be incorporated into my diet. I ended the night by re-uniting with some good friends at our old high school's dance show. It was nice to meet with those I spent the last four years with as they had no clue I had decided to change my ways.
Later that night after the show my best friend came over to my house as we were going to marathon The Hobbit so he could watch the Battle of Five Armies with us that Saturday. I remember being excited telling my family and my best friend about my new diet. It was even more exciting when my mom and best friend told me I should not start this diet as it would be unhealthy and would "Give me a Heart Attack." I was not mad at their concern, I am happy to have people who are worried about my health. I was excited that their words did not discourage me one bit. I knew at that moment that I had made the right decision.
Love The Process
I started my diet in December when my latino family generates the most food possible. They told me I started my diet at the wrong time. They told me I could have started in January after the tamales and other holiday treats. Had I done that I probably would have gained weight. Instead of moving forward I would have probably gained ten pounds and reached 300 pounds. Had that happened I do not think I would be here typing this story.
I often evaluate what was so fun about my weight loss journey and came to the realization that I enjoyed it because I did it for myself. I loved every meal. I was excited everyday because I was working my way to achieve my goal. I never once cheated on my diet. It never even crossed my mind. I have never felt more dedicated and passionate about anything in my life. This diet became a part of me and I accepted it with open arms.
May 1st, 2015
My friends and I often dispute on which is better, Marvel or DC. As we all know DC is better (childhood memories of Batman will trump any of your arguments in the comments section). I woke up excited because I got paid that night along with Avengers: Age of Ultron releasing. I know you are waiting for me to mention the glorious moment where I weighed myself and I hit those 200 pounds but it did not happen. In fact it was not until 4 days later I remembered I set that goal. We often forget some long term goals, but when I stepped on that scale and saw 197 pounds I could not help but breakdown into tears of joy. I stared into the mirror and laughed at myself as tears came down my face. The same mirror I once stared at in disgust became my best friend. It was surreal I remember putting on my old size 46 pants and dancing around in joy.
How Do I Feel Three Years Later?
Three years later I still weigh 170 pounds. I am happier with the range of clothes I can wear. I no longer have to worry about being stared at when taking a seat. I also have endless amounts of soccer jerseys in my closet. I feel amazing and I cannot thank my old self enough for the work he put in.
Life after obesity was awkward. For starters I had to buy complete new wardrobe, undies included. I enjoyed smiling and having strangers smile back. There are many little things that change when you lose weight, but honestly I am still Miguel. I still see through the same two eyes. My favorite part about my weight loss journey was inspiring others to lose weight. Having them come to me and share their stories is what made this weight loss journey a success. I often wish I could experience those six months it took to lose 130 pounds again. It was one of the happiest moments in my life and I hope after reading this you go out and accomplish that thing you have always wanted. I no longer need to dream about unzipping myself.
Thank you for spending time to see what it was like during those life changing months. I encourage each and every one of you to share with me what is your irresistible dream. Write it down to yourself. Ask yourself what is something you have always wanted and why have you not accomplished it yet? Let's start making that dream a reality today.
Remember, Do not let anyone tell you that you cannot accomplish your dreams. All it takes is yourself to believe in that dream and follow that belief. I cannot wait to see you succeed. I will leave you with one of my favorite quotes from 'The Pursuit of Happyness'
You got a dream... You gotta protect it. People can't do somethin' themselves, they wanna tell you you can't do it. If you want somethin', go get it. Period.