Hey team,
A really quick post from me. I know many of you follow a long with me for food, contests and fitness related stuff. But I've also posted a couple of bits and bobs about mental health in my time here on Steemit. That's what I want to jump back in to today.
A small number of you may have read my #introduceyourself post when I first joined a few months ago. If you haven't, give it a read HERE and get to know who Coach Ben is just a little bit better. There I talk about my battles with depression and not feeling good enough. And I want to share a little something I've learned through those difficulties with you today.
Give yourself permission to be sad
This one trick has helped me through a lot of difficult times. It's not going to solve anything, and it's not going to make you feel suddenly happy when times are hard. But giving yourself permission to be sad, is important - it helps.
For anyone who has ever suffered depression or anxiety, or just felt they weren't good enough, this trick will help. When you are depressed you feel down on yourself and who you are - you feel that you should not be depressed or should be in some way able to fight the depression and that because you can't, you are not good enough.
Millions of people have depression not because their life is bad or they have something to be sad about. Depression can affect people from every walk of life, in every possible situation. I have a great family, no drama, a fiance, a stable job, my own house and enough money to buy and do the things I want - yet I still get depression often. I used to feel like a fraud in some way because I had depression but had nothing to be depressed about.
But you know what?
If you have depression, or anxiety or are struggling with any other kind of mental health - it's OK. It's OK to be sad, scared, upset, struggling. You don't need a reason - depression can affect anyone at anytime.
As soon as I gave myself permission to feel as I felt, I stopped beating myself up for feeling that way. I stopped feeling pathetic and worthless for feeling that way. It was a load off my mind. When you're suffering with depression, you need as much pressure taken off as possible - that includes pressure you put on yourself to try and be happy.
Give yourself permission to be sad.
You do not have permission to give up
I feel there is a difference here between giving yourself permission to feel sad and giving yourself permission to give up. The idea that you're giving yourself permission to feel crappy is a way to take your own pressure off yourself. What it should not be is a decision to give up completely.
For anyone who have experienced mental health problems, you will probably know what I mean by the downward spiral. You feel pretty down, then start not going outside as much, or eating as well. Soon you stop drinking less water and not sleeping and things get worse and worse and you feel worse and worse. If you give yourself permission to just give up completely - that's not constructive.
Give yourself permission to feel down is different. Tell yourself it's OK to feel as you do. Your feelings are valid, you are valid, and you always will be. But never give up!
Thanks for taking the time to read this little ramble from me,
Yours in health,
Ben