Lordy ho and flippitty chop, I am as rough as old boots today. I think I may have drank a little too much last night.
I quite literally feel as if a bull has given me a beating with it's penis.
It's at moments like this however I remember the wise teachings of the elders...
So this week I chose some gentle summer beers that should be easy on my constitution.
Here goes... sigh.
I love blondes! They are my Kryptonite. I can refuse them nothing.
Will this one from the Black Isle Brewery tickle my fancy enough to raise the mizzen mast?
Look at the head on that!! What's a man to do with all that foam? It's like an opening night party at an Ibiza club!
I know...
Ach. It's nice enough. It tastes like lager. Sort of nice lager. I mean I could drink a lot of it if I didn't feel like a badger had taken advantage of my mouth whilst I slept.
It's smooth. I think. My taste buds are a bit gubbed after the beer last night. I will give it a 6/10 booms
Oh man, everything is like such an effort. My arms are like wet bits of string which are really hard to lift.
Still, these beers won't drink themselves.
Next.
Here we are, another inoffensive gentle beer for a man on the wrong side of roughness.
Perhaps it will shake the oily gleeb from my eyes.
At least this one looks like a proper beer. That's the thing with blondes they look amazing but are often shite. I mean the beers of course...
This looks splendid. Let's taste.
Aaaaahh, that's better. This is a proper beer. Nice bitter hoppy bite to it. It's got a deep taste. It actually clears my mouth a bit.
What does the man in the video think?
Well, he seems to know what he is talking about! I reckon the Fife Gold is bringing me back to life a bit. Hurrah! Saturday is saved!! 7.5/10 booms!
Well, I feel all tickety boo now. Maybe I will have just a couple more!
Cheers everyone!