My time in the dungeon was over. The case of the Shadow I.T was closed. Now I was returning to the fold, a few more scars and more determined than ever to root out injustice in the murky underworld of Information Technology.
I had a few leads to chase up in the Project Cirrus case but first a little R&R was called for.
Except, there was a dame sitting at my desk.
Hey Boomdawg.
She said with a suave confidence, as if she had freshly steamed her vagina.
I pulled up a chair and reversed it before straaddling it like it was a bucking bronco.
What can I do for you sweetcheeks?
I stuck a pen in my mouth and gave it a thoughtful chew. It wasn't often a broad called in to my office. This one acted like she knew me?
What you up to at lunch?
I gave her the hardboiled egg eyes.
You got some chops comin in here sister and talking trash about lunch.
Yeah yeah when you get your head out of the clouds, I will see you in the usual place.
She laughed, then got up and left.
Hmm, I got up and sat in my own chair. Her scent lingered, musky, like a snake. The usual place? This must have been some kind of coded message so that we could not be tracked.
I got up and pulled on my jacket again. My colleague Mikey looked up from his desk.
Hey, you going out? You just got here!
I leaned over him.
Cluck cluck Mikey, in Prison, you're either a bull or a hen.
My name's not bloody Mikey!
He clucked furiously.
I tipped my fedora at him and left.
I paced the seedy streets of Glasgow and thought about the dame at my desk. She claimed she knew me, she wouldn't be the first that's for sure. Wait, what else had she said?
When you get your head out of the clouds...
Out of the clouds? Cirrus was a type of cloud. Was this yet another lead in the Project Cirrus case?
I found my feet leading me into my favourite coffee shop.
Gimme some Joe, Joe.
I snapped to the barista.
He shook his head and muttered something about his name not being Joe. I wasn't fooled.
I took my coffee and scanned for a spare seat. There! Sat at a table was the dame from my desk. I sat across from her.
Well well well, of all the joints to choose you happened to be in this one?
She looked at me as if I had thrown a dead seagull at her.
Stop being a dick, we always come here.
Tell me about Project Cirrus?
I barked at her.
She raised an eyebrow.
You mean the project to put all our systems in the cloud?
Nothing's that easy sister.
Layers within layers, was she feeding me some false geese?
Yeah, they are hoping to spin up our systems in the cloud and remove our dependency on costly infrastructure so much.
I cast her a canny eye, like a frog would at a Canadian.
Put all our systems in the cloud?
Yeah, crazy eh! Anyway, what you up to at the weekend?
I humoured her with small talk whilst I pondered what she said. Once my coffee was done I slouched off.
Could this be all that Project Cirrus was? Putting our entire IT infrastructure into the cloud? It seemed too easy and yet as my great grandfather once said If it blinks, shoot it.
I realised I had left my fedora in the cafe. Damn. I turned on my heel and trudged back to get it.
As I turned the corner I gasped, what was this???
Outside the cafe the dame was talking to an old man who was blowing out large clouds of vape. She nodded curtly then walked briskly away. The old vaping man looked furtively left and right, then he moved off down the alley behind the cafe.
It was him. I had been fed a yarn. I knew it!!
I ran to the cafe and got my fedora back. Jamming it tightly on my head I moved to the entrance of the alley the vaping man had disappeared down.
Time for some real answers.
