El Jefe paced back and forth in front of his staff. We were all gathered in a small room.
Once upon a time we would have needed a bigger room but not now. Not since we had adopted a dynamic resourcing model with the intelligent use of business partnerships.
We must be SMARTer in how we approach challenges.
Said El Jefe in a curious singsong voice as if a lady was gently nibbling at his roary biscuit.
We must...
He paused, looking skyward for a moment as if his old mum was egging him on.
We must be bold.
He took it in turns to look us in the eye, one by one. It wasn't hard. There were few of us permanent staff left.
He gave me an extra long look as if still wondering if it was true that I had taken a photo of my very own penis in his Rum and Coke at Christmas.
Maybe...
It would have to be a Christmas night-out ninja who could pull off such a feat surely?
I gave him a Don't worry, I've got your back, Boss-man kind of smile.
He made a grumphing face as if deeply unhappy and moved on.
We must... Be brave...
He leaned forward as if fighting an impossibly strong wind.
I marvelled at how he stayed upright.
Bold and Brave... And SMART...
He bit his top lip and sucked in slightly through his teeth.
Can we do this?
He asked, hopefully rhetorically because no-one answered.
Can we pull together and right this ship?
Ship? The small group that we were looked at each other uneasily. Were we pirates now? Should we be spanking each others bottoms and singing songs about rum?
Erm, hurrah?
I said out loud less than enthusiastically.
El Jefe shot me a venomous look as if I was masturbating into a left-handed mitten.
Then let us be bold... And brave... SMART too but never... Never stupid.
El Jefe bowed his head before shuffling out of the room
What the fuck was all that about?
Asked my mate BinJuice staring after El Jefe.
I shook my head.
Fuck knows mate. Fuck knows. Something's bad's coming though. Something bad's coming...