I thought for a long while about writing nothing below this photo, but there are more things to say.
I know. Self-help shit is so passe. I don't have anything figured out and anyone who claims to is lying to you, themselves, or just wants your money. But- and this is a big but- there are ways to enjoy your time slightly more on this strange orbiting sphere and if you listen (and listen well, through your own filter) you might just live a tiny bit happier. Yes, only a tiny bit. If you're anything like me, you're full of self doubt, anxieties, a relentless hopelessness that permeates much of your day, and a constant fear of waking up tomorrow to an octopus in your bed, but you can push those feelings to the back-burner and learn to enjoy a few things here and there. Since so many self-help seminars and books are written in step format, I guess I'll go ahead and do the same.
1st step. Be as fucking goofy as you want to.
Who is going to judge you if you act on all those strange impulses you have? Everyone. But, fuck them. They're scared to post embarrassing photos on Instagram, they are embarrassed when they say something the group won't agree with, they're scared to fart in the elevator. Where's the fun in that? Why are we so dispositioned to not stand out in a crowd, for fear of ridicule? This isn't Junior High (unless you're still in Junior High, then... good luck). Make a fool of yourself now and again. If nothing else, you'll look back on the time you went to the nude beach and have a good laugh.
2nd Step. Do what you say you're going to do, and don't say shit you're not.
I spent a good amount of my life saying I was going to do this or that- start a hot sauce business, move to Alaska, save money, travel, etc. Most of those things I didn't do, not because I didn't actually want to do them or that they were impossible, but because I was terrified of actually changing my life. Quitting a stable job seems like such a leap until you're on the other side. Moving to a new state seems daunting until you're in that place looking for a new house. I began actually following through with these crazy notions at some point, and now when I say crazy things, nobody thinks I'm bullshitting. I've changed my entire life from drunken nights coming up with a half-assed plan, because I set myself to follow through. Once you do it, you know you can set your mind to anything.
3rd Step. Keep an open mind about people, no matter how ridiculous they seem.
This guy, yeah that guy in the picture above... He moved into my house as a stranger. On the second day of living with me, I awoke to him in my room playing guitar at 8am and shouting for me to wake up. I hated his guts at that very moment. Somehow, he has become one of my best friends. He let us stay with him in California and graciously spent every moment off with us, showing us around and entertaining us. I would have discounted him immediately, would have spoken to this day about how he was an asshole. Yet, somehow he grew on me. Every person you meet is a potential friend, no matter how they rub you the first time.
Step 4. Don't follow fucking self-help guides on the internet.
Get out there. Do what you wanna do. Stop Googling "Is my life fucked because I didn't become rich at 21?" See some shit. And if that's not your bag, don't see shit. But do what you want, cause someday soon you'll be Googling "Is my life fucked because I didn't become rich at 40?"
I guess four steps is enough. Maybe I'll start a cult. Cult of The Big 4.
Just kidding.
Thanks for reading, please read my other posts and don't follow any bullshit advice you read on the internet.
-KJ