HOLA AMIGOS!!!
Disclaimer: I tend to go off on a tangent and tell side stories to give meaning to the current subject, idea, person. place, or thing. If you can't follow along with this type of story telling then ya might ought to move along. I am full of energy both positive and negative. But I am also a light at the end of a tunnel.
In 2010 I was diagnosed with Bi-polar disorder, depression, anxiety and schizophrenia. I was place on a grip of meds over time trying to treat the sympathies. I wound up taking 21 pills a day. This in turn made me such a zombie. And not myself. I needed to do something to take me away from this land of the dead. I had no idea wtf to do have always had a desire to be creative.
I love art but never could draw, or paint. Maybe I was just too critical of myself. I still am quite critical of myself. As I sit here recollecting this I think about 7th grade. I had wood shop, and art the first semester. Then metal shop, home-ec, and art 2. In these classes I always set out to do something more than the assignment called for. I guess it is called thinking outside the box. I don’t think I knew it at the time though. I just now figured that out.
In wood shop we had to do a gumball machine. It was a mason jar that sat atop of a housing that had a wheel with a v cut out which was what grabbed the gumball and brought it out to the dispensary. While I wanted a mechanism like the game “Mousetrap” Ya know like had a dominoes effect. I spent the longest time of all my class mates on the design process. My instructor got on me about taking so long and that I wouldn’t finish on time. I still kept at it. I eventually had to scrap that idea and went with a “Tunnel of love” I finished in time, but because of taking so long I got a C on the project. But the instructor and my classmates loved it.
Art class I cannot remember the project but we were learning the process of using grids to replicate art. Yet again I took the longest at conceptualizing the project. I would spend such a long time just drawing a cline in one of the boxes of the grid making it EXACTLY like it was supposed to be. Again my desire for excellence got me a mediocre grade in the project.
In my homec class I made this rabbit of some sorts. Yet again to try and out do my classmates and go above and beyond what the project called for. side note; from the day I was born to today I have never been able to color inside the lines. I will always go outside them. I have always been an outsider. End side note I received another C for this project because my stitching was atrocious.
Now the time came for metal shop. We had to braze rods together to a design we drew out, a blueprint so to speak. AGAIN. My conceptualization took the longest. I couldn’t think of anything. Side note; when I have an assignment or a project I draw a blank and I mean a blank. I go completely numb and zero energy and or thoughts escape me. Until the final moments of the project. Then I am 0-100 at that point. End side note the design I chose was The Teenage Mutant Nina Turtles. I didn’t even like them at the time. However I knew they were popular and figured if I did something like this maybe just maybe I would get the accolades from my peers and the instructor.
Well as I took the longest in conceptualization the shop teacher was the wood shop teacher from the previous semester and told me this was a great and amazing idea and he didn’t think I would get it done in time. My peers scoffed at the idea and many were near competition. I would get to shop during lunch to catch up on my project. I slowly but surely was making up for lost time. I can remember all the curves in this design. I used a machine to make the curves, a vice to make the angles. I started out with the complete outside shape of the turtles and worked my way to the inside. My classmates were always coming over to see my progress. What was cool was some of the fellas in my class that had completed their projects started to ask if they could help me. They saw how behind I still was and those cats were TMNT fans. I had never had anyone think what I did was cool. Now the “cool kids” wanted to help me. Funny thing they could make the lines that they were working on perfectly. I on the other hand couldn’t. Like I said in the previous sidebar. I got the project done and got just an above average grade because of my in ability to stick with the syllabus.
Everybody loved all of the projects except for me. I believed and still do today that they were jankey. They weren’t good enough. The same holds true today. I will spend an exuberant amount of time on my designs or on the designs for my customers. I’ll spend time on a single line that no one will ever notice. It is my strive for excellence. To I guess show that I can do anything and to show that I am more than I appear to be. side note; I’m thinking to myself that I don’t care what people think about me. But this is reveling to me that I do care what people think. I guess to show myself that I am more than what I appear to project. End side note
So one night after I had been out and got drunk with my friends I came home and I can’t remember if my mom and I got into a fight or if she was even home. But I hated myself. I hated who I was and I wasn’t good enough. I tore down posters of bands; I destroyed the things I loved. I destroyed that TMNT project that I fucking hated that everyone else loved. I hate you I hate you I hate you. I said that over and over side note; I’m just realizing I was saying that to myself. I am not good enough and never will be good enough. Was what I was saying. It wasn’t about anything or anyone but me. End side note I was in tears and didn’t understand why my mother didn’t love me why I was such an outcast. I was in full rage. Then I passed out. When I woke up the next morning I was all wtf did I do. I felt bad that day and every day since then about that. I really did and do love that TMNT project. I think it was the most epic thing I ever created. The thing was more than just a thing. From that design I created comradery, acceptance, and friendship. I became part of the "cool kids" but with an outsiders permit.
I had to tell all of this to get to where I started with this here little writing project. So with the pills and the realization of I was losing who I was I decided to think about when I come out of this I needed to have something to do. Something to make a new career and create a new me. But what?? I love technology. I love design, I love troubleshooting. Well the interwebs was really moving forward and I knew that I loved it and that business and people were gonna need websites. I WANT TO BE A WEB DESIGNER!!!
So I searched everything out about web design. I started practicing HTML, CSS, and SEO. I absolutely LOVE SEO. SEO is like chess match to me. For months I did this and because of the bi-polar mania, and me and who I am I wouldn’t sleep. I would stay up for days on end devouring information. Putting that information into practice. And then work the kinks out of my personal projects. I made my websites renderable on all browsers. AND THEN, render on all mobile devices as well. This was a beautiful challenge for me. I would check my sites on the W3 Consortium. Fix one issue and 32 new ones would pop up. I loved and hated this. That is the troubleshooting side of me that loves to resolve problems. I dunno if that’s the mania, a man thing, or a Capricorn thing, lol. Thing of it is I love that shit!!!
After sometime I realized that many places wanted people with either a degree in IT of x amount of years’ experience. Well I was just some long haired country boy who wouldn’t even fit in with these cats, so I enrolled in college. Lemme tell you the fact that I had to take English and Math classes burned me something fierce. And per me I rebelled against it. Not only that But I had to take ENG COMP 2!!! I sought out any means I could to get out of those damn classes. I just got through those, thank god. And as usual, got a mediocre grade. Almost had to retake COMP2. Till I found a flaw in the syllabus. LMAO.
Now on to the reason I signed up. The design aspects. I love working in Dreamweaver. I WAS ROCKING AND ROLLING. Then I was learning JavaScript language. WHAT A CHALLENGE!! Now I was in the SEO class. This was a short class and I freaking knew more that the instructor!!! I was calling her out left and right. She did not like me at all. SO MUCH SO her and I had a meeting with the dean!! He saw that I was right and she was lacking. After the meeting he just said look dude. You’re right. But can you just not call her out in the open like that. BRO!!! She’s teaching outdated shit!! I can’t allow that to happen. For my classmates to be spending this amount of money for an improper education!!! Well I will have to put you on suspension or some shit he said. Fk. Ok fine.
I made it through.
I got a couple little jobs for web design. I started social media marketing. I made a few FB business pages and took over a couple businesses FB and redesigned their cover photos, the profile pics and increased their engagement. I then got a job as a sub contractor for a fella and made dental assistant school websites. Part of my main job was editing photos and making graphics, I loved this. We would also go out into the field and work on businesses networks. MAN THIS WAS FUN.
There’s more to it but I may touch on that at some point.
I eventually started a lil business called Arizona Heavy Metal. We promoted the local metal scene in AZ. We did interview, created flyers, Streamed the shows live. I travelled all over the state of AZ. Doing this stuff. Then I had the idea of making shirts!! This was BRILLANT!!! My wife at the time was meh. About it. I did it and started to sell but because she didn’t have the desire and thought it was stupid. She didn’t help or support it. So I quit.
Remember. I was on a lot of pills and needed support. I decided that my creativity was being harnessed by those pills. My life had gotten worse at the same time AHM was moving forward. So. I quite the meds against the advice of the DRs. I was on top of the world at the time but in reality I wasn’t. The mania took me over and I was doing shit that I should not have been doing.
I wound up leaving my wife and got with another woman and that was a complete wreck. She was down for the shirt making thing and we rebranded ourselves. We then were taking off with the photography side of the business. But per the usual. Shit went south in a hurry.
Fast forward to 2020. I meet a beautiful, kind, understanding, and generous woman. With whom I build the ever so sought after loving relationship. After a while I tell her about my past endeavors and she encourages me to pick up my design dreams. We go full blown into this area and I am now creating just as the universe desires. She has never done anything like this or used any of the design software in her life. She too is now a creator!! And Yetis Tees was born and thriving!!! We have designed shirts for businesses of various degrees and for individuals with great ideas. We have redesigned logos and we have developed lasting relationships both personal and business.
The reason I wrote this is because of an article I read about Norman Reedis in Entrepreneur magazine. Here is a LINK if you would like to read its well as my Personal relate ability to this cat. Life and business alike are full of challenges and they will always be there. We can attach to those hindrances or we can let loose of them and excel in any endeavor.
I fight my illness on a minute by minute basses. I have been picked on and mocked a good portion of my life. The same with my girl. I am a personal magnet for weirdo's, REEREEs, and freaks. I have accepted this and love it!! These are my people. We are the NORMIES and the rest are the outcast. No not really. I am of the belief that there isn’t a book of standards or who gets to decide what is acceptable or not. It is all subjective and we and we alone make that call. But no really, that group above. We are the norm but we don’t reject the outsiders, we embrace because we understand that it is our flaws that make us unique…
Have A Happy Day And Don't Forget To Be Awesome!!!
Says,
Yeti
PS If you follow me ya already know how I get side tracked. It's not the destination, its the journey we take getting there. My road is slideways and up and down..
P.S.S. Haven't posted because I tend to want to put my own graphics in my post and then I get sidetracked and forget that I have a post ready to put up. So I apologize.