Random Tendrils Of Garden Wisdom
As a part time librarian, I have shelved the 50 Shades Of Grey an inconceivable amount of times. Today, as I pulled a myriad of weeds, it occurred to me that my fingers had turned fifty shades of brown. After weeding my garden and strawberry patch I have more layers of dirt stratified on my flesh than is probably socially acceptable in most circles.
There are many things I do in the garden by habit. Some of those tasks I learned to do by reading and research, other plant care to dos arose out of me being boneheaded and learning the hard way. I prefer path number one for sure.
Take growing peas for instance. I don’t even plant the things until I have the trellis installed. There is nothing fun about putting a trellis into or staking any plant after the crop is planted. Tiptoeing through the tendrils is not a song that I want to exist in my world, and no, I’m not going to tell you about that one time I got tangled in the pea vines when I was trellising them long after they should have been....Trellis early!
Then we have strawberries. Every few years I install new plants because I live with a horde of fruit devouring Hawaiians and strawberry plant yields tend to decrease after a while. This year I put in 100 June bearing strawberry plants, and one task that’s super important to do with first year strawberry plants is to walk around and pinch the flowers off the plants so they can put their energy into plant development rather than fruit development.
I’m not going to bovine fecal matter ya here, I hate pinching off potential strawberries! But like any other garden chore, there’s a method behind the madness. I know If I pinch off the flowers the first year of planting that my crop the second year will be YUGE! Well, if I keep the beds weeded, fended, watered, and mulched that’s is, you know, the small stuff.
Speaking of small stuff, if you don’t like manual labor I would advise you NOT to plant potatoes. I have tried growing potatoes a plethora of different ways, tires, stacking boxes, in a huge crate, the list goes on, and hands down my best yields come from the trench and hill method. Of course the weeds are always trying to Theodore Roosevelt on me. By that I mean the devious, nutrient-sucking ground covers are always trying to take my potato hills like a bunch of degenerate imports. Today I beat back a weed incursion and hilled my potatoes for the second time this year already.
My filthy fingers and I then moved on to the greens scene. Weeding lettuce, chard, beets, carrots, kale, and spinach requires a bit more precision and I got the job done with finesse. Hopefully my neighbors will forgive me for that Tainted Love solo...
Right now I find myself fifty shades of rather exhausted after fighting off the weedvaders all afternoon. Half of my garden is covered in greenhouse flooring barrier. Without that blessed petrochemical based barrier I would be fighting a losing battle against the Invading weedizens , but for now we have reached a temporary cease fire with each other. It is time to engage in my next skirmish, carcass cleansing. My bathtub will never be the same...
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And as most of the time, all of the images in this post were taken on the author’s still recovering from playing that wackadoodle playlist iPhone.