I went back to work recently. My daughter is now with a nanny. In the beginning it was heartbreaking - being away from my daughter, sitting on my ass staring at a computer screen all day working with entitled millennials. But it's been about a month into it now and I see all my insights from reading hundreds of psychology, spiritual, self-improvement books are being put to the test.
Ever since Trump was elected DC has been riddled with anxiety and depression. I know this for a fact because when I tried to make my first appointment with a well reviewed psychiatrist, the receptionist told me that I had to wait 2 months until my first appointment and that it had been like this ever since Trump was elected. The energy in my office is dumpy with long periods of depressing silence. There's a lot of sighing and doctors appointments, stooped postures and defeated expressions. It's enough to make me want to run away every day until the past couple of days.
Mondays of course are always the worst. But this last Monday I made a choice to not let the quagmire energy suck me in. I will try to be a lighthouse. The way I do this is to simply be kind. I am mindful of saying simple things like "good morning" and "how are you?" and "have a nice day." I say these things in person and in emails. This may seem easy to many of you but for someone like me who has had social anxiety for her whole life, being kind in an unkind environment is like swimming for the first time, or at least in very chilly water.
The most notable result of this choice I made for myself is that my relationship with my supervisor is better than ever. I had previously worked with her before for 6 years and it was a complicated tumultuous relationship and I could feel that she was unsure about re-hiring me. I simply made the effort to ask how she was and how her life was going and offered to help her when she didn't feel well. This made all the difference. I saw what no one else is willing to see - a human being who has enormous challenges she must face on a daily basis and I truly have empathy for her. When was the last time you had empathy for your boss? It's a worthwhile exercise. It's exercises like these that make office work worthwhile. How can you make someone feel a little bit better? How can you brighten someone's day just a touch? It's with the subtlest of genuine human connection can you make a huge difference. That's the lovely thing about it - it takes such little effort if it comes from the heart. When you live from the heart, everything feels a little lighter.
As Baba Neem Karoli said - Love everyone and tell the truth.
Stay tuned.