I think about death a lot. And yeah, I mean that both ways. I have wanted to die hundreds of times before, and I also think about death as an entity in itself. What it entails, what it means for others, and ultimately what it means for me.

Since I become very attached to things, death scares me because it is an ending of a cycle, of a life. It means I no longer have what I used to have, and using this definition, I guess you could say I have died a thousand deaths over and over again during this lifetime. Each time being equally scary. But death also fascinates me for this same reason; it is the ending of a cycle, it means that something has finished, there is freedom and a space that wasn't there before. It's liberating.

To answer your question, I guess I could say yes and no. I still have things I want to do, places to visit and people to see again, but at the same time it is all fleeting and not really all that important, so if death decides to visit... I guess I would go gladly.