One way to betray you is......

Pretending to be who you're not. To love, what "SOMEONE IS NOT YET", that disconnects you from what YOU ARE. And that, fundamentally, is a form of disloyalty, to yourself.

These days I heard a good friend talking about it, while we were having a glass of wine, and I kept thinking about something she said“ "Many times we fall in love with the potential and not with the reality.”Without a doubt, she is right.

Because we don't always fall in love with the real person, but with what we hope they will become. And that fantasy, that emotional fiction that at first seems like hope, ends up being a trap.

Why a trap? Because you end up clinging to an imaginary version of your partner, justifying gaps with phrases like: “He has a good heart,” “He's hurt,” “Someday he'll show me love.” See? We fall into tales of cowboys or roads, ourselves.

In my view of things, maintaining that vain hope of “I think it's going to change now" is absurd. Behind those words, more than love, there is wear and tear. There is a broken heart, waiting for the other to wake up, look at each other, seek help, learn to love each other, and maybe, maybe, suddenly, at some point, he will be ready to love someone.

And in the meantime, you waiting for it to rain up 😃 Understand, first of all, that no one changes because someone else asks, that everyone ‘loves’ from their own wound, and that if you have to beg for love or wait to see if it manifests, it's not there, get away and run away from there.

Also accept that, many times, the greatest act of self-love is to leave. Not because you don't love anymore. But because you finally understood that you too deserve TO BE LOVED with EVERYTHING that someone, ALREADY IS, and not with what maybe he will become... someday.

I always say that I am a professional of failure, an expert in losing, and that is not low self-esteem, it is a real knowledge about myself and my ability to recover from adversity and to prove to myself that I can.

We discover ourselves when we face adversity, death and pain. To be strong in the face of adversity and happy in the face of the good things in life, your self-esteem is the force that will move your world.

When you have self-love, you embrace yourself just as you are: sometimes being able to do everything and other times broken, tired, under construction, and yet, you dare to take a step towards that which you do want to be, even if you feel afraid.

Building your self-esteem will often lead you to the uncomfortable moment of facing your darkest truths and even your miseries, those that you hide under the politically correct carpet of "well-being" to be and look like who you really are not.

It is to rebel without making a scandal, simply stopping acting to the sound of others touching you. It's not betraying yourself anymore to fit in. See?

Janitze 🌹