One of my customers is a religious organisation, I think they're Pentecostal gospel or something like that. I do like to play them up a bit when I speak to them, given they've known me for nearly 20 years I can get away with it.
Me: "Abele-eeeeeeeee, how are you today?"
Abele: "Very good Peter, how are you?"
Me: "Not too bad although I was wondering if you could have a word with the big man upstairs and get me a Porsche 911?"
Abele: [Laughing] "You could do that yourself Peter but he will only give you that which will improve your life. If it will harm you in the future then he will not give it to you."
Me: "Wait! What? He won't let me have that which will harm me? If that's the case how come he let me marry the misses then?!"
Abele: [Roaring with laughter] "Oh Peter, you really are a terrible man."
Me: "I know. Now about this Porsche...."
Originally posted: 10/11/16
My actual name is Pete, you can find out Here why I use the username dick_turpin.
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