Every single year I vow I'll only plant one zucchini plant, and every year I plant four. It's great when they first start fruiting. I never buy them out of season, partly due to expense and partly due to the fact they're usually scarred, flaccid things. Homegrown is the bomb.

If you have ever grown them, you know if you turn your back on a growing zucchini, you'll end up with something rather like a zeppelin - freaking massive, needing two hands to lift it and becoming the impetus for jokes that usually involve oversized penises, as the photo of my Dad below attests, taken during the Great Zucchini Harvest of 2010.

I was looking through some recipes for zucchini cake the other day and came across variations of chocolate zucchini muffins with various flours. The following is a bit of a mish mash of the recipes I found online and what I felt would work for me, such as experimenting with eggless eggs mix. They worked beautifully, although disappeared fast. It doesn't matter though - I have heaps more zucchinis coming out of the garden.

ZUCCHINI CHOCOLATE EXPRESSO MUFFINS

1 cup almond flour
1 cup buckwheat flour
1/2 cup tapioca flour
3 tsp egg replacer (I used Orgran)
1 cup cacao (I used a cacao/maca blend I had!)
3 tbsp nut butter (I used peanut/hemp seed blend)
3/4 cup coconut milk or other vegan milk
3 tbsp coconut oil
2 tbsp vegan margarine/butter
2 teaspoons bicarb soda
3 tbsp apple cider vinegar
1 medium zucchini or 2 small zucchinis, chopped
3/4 cup rice syrup (can substitue 1/2 cup maple syrup)
1/2 cup fresh made strong expresso

Blend all the ingredients in a food processor (you can do it without one, but make sure you grate the zucchini first). Place into muffin cups in a muffin tray and cook at 160 degrees C for 40 minutes.

Ice with chocolate icing mix of your choice if you really want to make it chocolatey! You can use two cups of almond flour if you like, which I do prefer, but almond flour is frigging expensive so half half worked just fine.

Now I just have to figure out what to do with the squashes.

The Great Squash Harvest of 2010. Will the harvest be as ridiculously fruitful this year?