and I Want To Tell You How Can Do The Same…
Hi, if your new to this site you may or may not be wondering who I am and why I decided to start this blog of mine. Well this post is less of an about page and more of an about me page, just so you know where I started from and why I truly believe if anyone really puts their mind, body, heart and soul into anything that you can do and become whomever you wish to become and live and create the life that you want, desire or are meant to be living. So let's get this post started, hi again my name is Shameka, Meka for short and I was born before the time of the selfie, Facebook and way before Instagram became people's lifeline. I was born into a two parent home William and Kamin Banks, I also had an older brother named Asad at the time of my birth. For the first few years of my life and through my childlike point of view my life seemed good but of course unannounced to me my home was filled with chaos and abuse, amongst the adults that I was in care of but I felt loved and I felt safe and secure, so at the time that's all that mattered.
As life went on though and as I got older but still very much a child all that safety, security, and love that I felt quickly disappeared and the chaos that I didn’t notice before became very much more apparent. My biological father left me and my brother's life way before I even knew his name and I was raised by my stepdad up until I was around 8 or 9 years old; I didn’t even realize my stepfather wasn’t my real father till I was 14. My parents fought on a regular basis, there were many days and nights of screams, followed by something breaking or shattering, a product of my mother throwing something at me step dads head.
Fear: fear is an extremely strong emotion, one that’s necessary for our survival but one that can also paralyze you, keeping us from fully enjoying or living life to the fullest, out of the fear of getting hurt or failure. Fear is not an emotion a developing child should be experiencing every morning, noon and night, surely it's not healthy for the development of a child's mental, physical and emotional growth but fear became an emotion that I was extremely familiar with as a child.
My stepdad eventually left my mom, me and my siblings behind, including my new baby sister. My mom blamed me for him walking out on us; most therapist and phycologist will tell parents in cases of divorce to make it very clear to the child or children that the divorce was in no way their fault, because children have a way of blaming themselves for the demise of their parent’s relationship, my mom didn't get that memo.
After the absence of my stepdad, the abuse and violence started to become more focused on my older brother; my mom began beating him almost every day, her weapon of choice was the extension cord, ripping his skin on his bare back. I and my little sister would be upstairs playing with dolls and my brother screams became the playlist of choice, it became normal, my mom told us he deserved it and mother know's best. My brother eventually followed in both my father's shoes and ended up running away from home when he was around 16 years of age and I did the same but not before the abuse that I already started suffering from, from the age of 8 kicked up into high gear for another addition 8 years of my childhood.
I guess because my mother no longer had a husband, boyfriend or son to beat on I became her last choice, my little sister still being too small. I’m not going to go through all the horrific, violent and creative ways that my mother abused me, the list would be way too long but let's just say, I’ve been stabbed, tied up and treated with rape by the hands of my mother, she even decided one day that it would be a good idea to teach me how to kill myself because she thought the world would be better off without me.
The abuse I suffered from my mother isn’t where the suffering ended for me , nor was it the loss of both my fathers but there was also sexual abuse from a cousin and a sexual assault as an adult, my life had the perfect ingredients to have just allowed life to beat me down, and for me to just roll over and give up and of course there were times when I wanted to but I didn’t, I survived and not only did I survive and thrived and I’m now living and creating a life that I want, desire and meant to be living; this took years and years of healing, forgiving, falling on my face and learning from my mistakes.
I’m traveling the world as a single, solo, black millennial female, who according to statistic should be dead, in jail, on drugs, or living a life less than what my full potential will allow. I want to use this blog, books, and YouTube channel to help inspire all but especially those who believe or have been told that living a life that is worthy would be impossible for them. This blog will be dedicated to my love of travel, helping others travel the world one country at a time through tips and tricks I’ve learned throughout my own travel journey but also inspiring others to heal, forgive and move on so you can get to a place where you can start living and creating a life of purpose and passion, taking charge of your mental, spiritual and emotional health, so if this is something that speaks to you please subscribe, or even check out my e-books to really get all the details about my upbringing and how I finally got to this point where I’m living a life of purpose, peace, and happiness.
Thank you for taking the time to read this post and if you believe that this can help or inspire anyone else please share and I hope to see you her again. Thank you