"When are you going to have a baby?"
"How many babies do you plan to have?"
"Hurry up and give your father/mother a grandkid!"
"Which college do you plan to enroll your kid in?"
Upon hearing news of our engagement, these were the questions that we were immediately peppered with. Like a spray of bullets, no matter how hard we try to dodge them, they still manage to find a way to hit us.
It's funny how there were all set up, too. Even though we get the occasional question of where we're going to live, people don't even bother how we plan to raise to raise the children. They just care how many we plan to have and how quickly those kids will come. No wonder the lower class families in the Philippines tend to have more children than the capacity of their house.
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I know it's not a culture thing though, talking about the questions. A few weeks ago, the recently promoted twice father and I had a hearty chat about the pressures he and his good lady faced when they were fresh from matrimonial bliss. Even though my fiancee and I are a bit younger, the situation still mirrored each other.
What is it with all the rush?
Sure, I get that society is on a constant treadmill, but can we just hit the pause button for a bit and live in the now? Mind you, this is coming from a guy who plans three steps ahead.
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For the married people out there, or even for the couples who were already at that stage in their relationship, how were you able to deflect these questions? Usually, I deal with this using jokes, but I fear I'm running out of them.
Okay, so I don't mean to offend anyone with this next point, because I'm a firm believer in "to each their own", but I couldn't help but notice that the people in my generation are in such a rush! By that I mean, some people in my high school batch already have kids that are going to enter high school soon. Sure, it's not just a generational thing, but I feel like it's becoming more and more common.
I'll admit, it's a bit narrow minded to think that there's only one sequence to things, and I might just be a bit conservative about it, but I often think people took the guidelines we were taught growing up as merely a friendly suggestion. I could count with one hand how many in our batch actually got married before they conceived a child. Just to give it a bit more context, there were more than 300 of us in that batch.
Look, I'm not saying that it's wrong to have unprotected premarital sex, but I'm not actively campaigning for people to do it. I don't think any of those people were coerced into having intercourse, and while many of those babies weren't planned, I just hope that they had the proper resources to raise the children. There's a reason why there was a sequence in place. Not because of some old timey thinking, but because people needed to know how to stand on their own before they bring another human being into this world.
All of the older generation chastise people for having children early on, and yet they're just waiting on the wings to urge people to hurry up and mass produce babies.
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Are we there yet?
The short answer is: not quite. People have mixed reactions about this next bit, and I'm sure you'll have differing opinions as well. Are you ready? Here goes. and I have never travelled alone on an overnight trip. It's always with friends or at least one other person. Older people have the notion that our generation can't keep it in their pants. And while many have proven that to be true, it's something that can't be generalized. Sadly, that's not something we can change. What we can have a say, however, is how we act accordingly.
As these wedding preps have shown, my fiancee and I disagree on a number of things, but one of the many things we have the same mind about is with regard to respect. Treat others like how you want to be treated, and all that. I'm perplexed how some people who blatantly disrespect others expect to be respected. If we can't change how the older generation thinks, then we decided to respect their wishes and wait our turn.
People our age who stick their dicks inside anything with holes and people our whose holes gets stuffed daily like their lives depend on it ridicule us for having such "strict parents". Really though, we could be screwing each other every chance we get, but we chose not to because we imposed an honest principle on ourselves. There's something to be said about patience and discipline, I feel. We don't judge other people for their free spirit and lifestyle choices, so I don't appreciate unsolicited criticism. Like I mentioned earlier, to each their own.
In a few days, we're going to be free from the self-imposed prison we incarcerated ourselves in. We did our time, and soon we're going to have a taste of the freedom that others have been experiencing for years. I think that makes marriage all the more sweeter, wouldn't you agree?
For couples living together for a while, what other difference does marriage provide? For people who've had kids before they got married, doesn't marriage only make their union legally binding?
So, we're going to take our time. We're going to enjoy ourselves, and we're going to make up for lost time.
The kids will come
We'll know damn well when we're ready. And, when they do come, I'm happy that my lady and I agree on the number and even the order. Like my sensational sis and bodacious bro
, I've always wanted to have a daughter first, followed by a son, then peace of mind. I know what a handful a baby boy is, so I want to get some reps in before I go through a battlefield. Trust me, I'm a baby whisperer, I know these things. Is it why my STEEMigos and I get along so well? Am I gravitated to them because I want to be like them when I become a parent?
What a relief it was to discover that Li wanted the same thing. Although, since it's all up to chance, we'll take what we get when we get it. There's no rushing it, after all.
How long until you decided it was time to have a kid?
We just had our confession earlier, as a requirement for marriage, so I must confess that writing this was very cathartic. Six more days to go, and the nerves are setting in!
I've been campaigning for witness account
for months now because I knew him way before Steemit. I can vouch that he's an awesome individual who has nothing but the best intentions for this platform. As I mentioned, my share of the expenses have been mostly from my last remaining savings from working for FoxyCart. Even though my contract has ended for a couple of years now, I would forever hold fond memories of my time there. Please do consider voting for him as a witness!