I have come across this interesting phenomena during the past years:
Nasty / rude people who are proud of their bitchyness.
By this social -or should I say antisocial behavior I refer to some people, who for example might oppose to norms and rules of social life, who can be less willing to associate with others (in a normal way), and often act very unfriendly toward others, at least if they don't benefit from acting nicely, or like the other person. On top of that they turn the perception of the acceptable way of treating others upside down in their heads, feeling somewhat proud of their rude nature. And don't think that I mean it isn't okay to be introvert or enjoy spending your time alone and not being the social butterfly -that's perfectly normal, okay and acceptable! I'm talking about people who do have the social skills and knowledge to behave in a decent manner, but who often choose to be rude and are not shamed of showing their dislike or spite toward others. Who resent others and often think they are above other people. I might generalize a bit just to make my point, so don't get huffy. It is inevitable that at some point of your life you will meet a person (or people) who you don't like or with who you can't get along with, but I think it's totally unnecessary to repeatedly show your dislike to them through your actions and comments.
I've heard some people defending themselves and their mean behavior with arguments like "I am like this (bitchy, selfish etc.) and you just have to accept it" and attitudes that suggest that being a bitch is the new cool. This makes me wonder how the hell do people think it's okay to justify their bad behavior by claiming themselves bitches/douchebags or why would they even want to do that?! Like I said, sometimes it feels like they are even proud of acting mean and I don't get it. Being mean is behavior that you can -and in my opinion should want to regulate, so for me it doesn't make sense why somebody would like to blame their persona for that and just happily continue acting that way. I mean, knock knock, is anybody there??? Of course it's healthy to recognize different sides of your persona and it's desirable to know who you are, but excuse me for asking -since when it's been cool to take in and accept yourself as a bitchy and mean person, instead of wanting to work on yourself and improve those qualities?! Why are some people happy like that -treating others like garbage? And why do some people feel okay to share their impolite thoughts and opinions about other peoples lives or fuck around with others on a daily basis? Does it make them feel good? Is it that they feel better about themselves, if they make others feel bad or in some cases worse than they already feel, by being a prick? In most cases pestering stems from ones indisposition and insecurity, or is the only way the person has learnt to act in a social situation. However in this case it's like they choose to be dicks and have the perception it's cool.
Having said all this, I understand that sometimes it's hard to act politely or friendly, especially if you loose your temper (or have a hasty temper in general). You might end up shouting disrespectful things to others if your emotions run high and take the power of you/your behavior. This has happened to me in a situation where I felt hurt and violated and which provoked feelings of injustice in me. I know it's normal to act immaturely every now and then, without being able to control your feelings and say or do things that you end up regretting and feel ashamed later. But I think precisely this, is the main difference between normal and in a way "acceptable" bad behavior versus the bitchy, bad attitude described above: the recognition that this kind of behavior IS NOT okay, the desire to learn to control your emotions better and show them in a more constructive way, and the willingness to treat people respectfully and politely on a daily basis even if you don't like them. Some might think it's two-faced to hide you dislike and try to understand others even though you think they don't deserve it, but I think it's socially correct and takes you further than disgracing others (openly).
Am I being too soft and blue-eyed believing in good and thinking kindness is what you should go for? Have you encountered this kind of behavior and what do you think about what I just described? I know there's someone thinking I'm such a wimp. That someone might be signing up this "I'm a bitch and it's okay"-attitude… I suggest you think again -is being a bitch (or douchebag/dickhead/asshole, choose whatever) really how you wanna profile yourself? Is it how you want to be described and remembered? I think the mean girl-attitude or bullying others openly is sooo last season.
I flag for kindness!
By Lorie Shaull from Washington, United States [CC BY-SA 2.0 (