When you are student, there are days when you wake up and wonder what to do. Especially if it is after the exams. There is no panic, no stress, no money and you have watched all the movies in the cinema. So, what do you do, you sign up to be your friend’s guinea pig.
I have this one weird friend that instead of being a doctor, she decided to go into Optometry. So, I became her practical practice and if I were to submit my definition of what Optometry is, after my experience I would definite it as:
‘The study of putting strange equipment and doing painful prodding and poking into someone’s eyes. Laugh at our own risk during the procedure’
The Morning
I prepare myself for the procedure and make sure that I eat something Malaysian and something healthy. After that I do my prayers to ask the Lord to ensure that my eyes remains healthy after the practical practice and not to subject me to any harm in the hands of untrained individuals.
Torture Starts
Here is an image to start the entire procedure.
You know what they always say about looking into a person’s eyes. You can see direct into their soul. In my case looking into my eyes, my soul is a doughnut. A Krispie Kreme doughnut. A yummy one with a cup of coffee.
The first check-up, it took 3 hours to complete the tasks. I was told to remain clam and asnwer all the questions as honestly as I could. I am so afraid if she asked whether I brush my teeth everyday. Because the truth can be foul. But fortunately for me, she did not ask me that.
I was told to look at the ceiling, relax and not to laugh. I didn’t plan to laugh but when someone tells you not to do something, suddenly you are reminded to do it. I started giggling and then I started laughing. I know I am immature, but what do you expect? I am still young. Got to be young childish and foolish before I can be old and wise.
The instrument is to look into the retina and the veins and blood vessels surrounding it. When someone looks into you eyes for a period of time, you run the risk of falling in love with that person. I think I might have fallen for her. But again, I remind myself that I have a boyfriend. So all is cool.
The funny part is when her tutor commented that my eyes are big and easy to carry out the procedure. I guess big eyes is a compliment. I imagine my eyes like those manga character that is more than 1/3 of the face but still look cute.
Optometrist must Draw?
I promise you that I am not kidding. My friend had to draw what she saw in my eyes. I hope she didnt draw a doughnut and coffee. I never thought that a doctor will have to be a part time artist for human veins and eye balls.
After the initial 3 hours, there is a further 3 hours to use more instruments. These instruments comes into direct contact with the eyes. Scary stuff.
The blue one is to check my eye pressure. I was pretty stressed up. At this juncture the giggling and laughing stoped. They had this anesthetic eyedrops to ease the pain from contact. It was pretty bad, my eye is actually resistent to the anesthesia. I felt the prick in my eyes. She tried twice but could not continue. It wasn't hurting but we have to stop before I go blind.
Then they did the ultrasound thing. She has only 3 attempts to pass the instrument test. This sounds a bit like ‘Who wants to be a Millionaire?’.
After scratching my left eye, they want to scratch my right eye. Fortunately the anaesthetic drops worked on my right eye, my eyes felt heavy and numb. It felt like Mike Tyson has punched me in the eyes. It wasn’t a pleasant experience.
Later that day, they decided to torture me more, they shine a bright orange light into my eyes. It hurt but I tried not to blink.
I would suggest that if you want to really hurt someone, bring them to my friend. She is like a North Korean interrogation officer that puts you on the chair and then make you suffer till you tell who is your boss.
The Journey Home
I was traumatised, so I decided to give my eyes a break and look at pleasant things. So I went to a park to chill out.