Querido papá, sé que debes estar buscándome sin descanso, porque sé cuánto amor me tienes y por eso no tengo ninguna duda de que estarás haciendo hasta lo imposible por encontrarme. Me gustaría mucho decirte que estoy bien, que no me ha pasado nada malo y que, pronto, nos volveremos a ver. Pero es algo que no puedo hacer, es algo que escapa por completo de mis manos.

No quiero atormentar a tu mente ya atribulada con los detalles de mi situación, más bien quiero recordarte lo mucho que te amo, lo maravilloso que ha sido para mí el tener un padre tan maravilloso como tú. Siempre me decías que eras la persona más afortunada, por tenerme, pero lo cierto es que estabas muy equivocado, la más afortunada siempre fui yo, por contar con mi madre y contigo, querido papá.

No voy a hablar de las cosas que me han tocado vivir en estos años, pero sí te diré que esas palabras que dijiste cuando ya me iba despidiendo, ese día, cuando nos separaron, se quedaron grabadas en mi corazón. “Te amo, mi preciosa pequeña”. Debo confesarte que ese día en particular esas palabras me llegaron a lo más profundo de mi ser. Me sonrojé y sonreí al alejarme. Y, aunque muchas veces me dijiste esas mismas palabras u otras parecidas, ese día fueron las más dulces y especiales para mí.

No lo sé, quizás algo me decía que esa sería la última vez que nos veríamos, y por eso mi mente y corazón estaban tan sensibles. Querido papá, amado papá, no sabes cuanto te he extrañado, no sabes lo deseosa que he estado cada día de despertar y descubrir que todo esto no ha sido más que un sueño, uno muy feo, una pesadilla, pero que ahora estarás justo en la cocina, como cada día, esperándome con mi café y con la más bonita sonrisa.

Que lamentable que no sea así, pero como dije, no quiero hablar sobre las cosas tristes, sino sobre las bonitas y especiales, esas que nos alegran el alma, esas que nos permiten seguir adelante, luchando, aunque todo esté en contra. Esas palabras, así como las muchas enseñanzas que me has dado durante toda mi vida, las llevo siempre presente. Fue ese amor y cariño el que me permitió sobrellevar la pérdida de mi madre, tu gran amor, y también lo que me ha permitido seguir luchando sin dudar, aun en los momentos más oscuros.

Quisiera decirte que sé cuánto tiempo ha pasado, pero la verdad es que lo ignoro por completo. Solo sé que he estado en lugares diferentes y que, aunque no haya visto a muchas personas, nunca he estado completamente sola. Lo más triste es que no soy la única en esta condición, al menos he visto a 20 jóvenes más.

No me permiten dar más detalles en esta carta, de lo contrario no te la van a hacer llegar. Han prometido que te la entregarán si me porto bien. No olvides nunca que te amo, papá. No sé si algún día nos volveremos a ver, solo espero que esta carta, de mi puño y letra, sea el combustible que tanto necesitas para seguir adelante luchando por vivir. No te pediré que me olvides, pero sí que dediques la mayor parte de tu tiempo a vivir tu vida. Yo estaré bien, con lágrimas en los ojos, muchas lágrimas, te pido que rompas esa promesa que seguramente has hecho. Por favor, ya deja de buscarme, te lo suplico, no sigas buscándome.

Dear Dad, I know that you must be looking for me without rest, because I know how much love you have for me and that is why I have no doubt that you will be doing the impossible to find me. I would very much like to tell you that I am well, that nothing bad has happened to me and that, soon, we will see each other again. But that's something I can't do, it's something that is completely out of my hands.

I don't want to torment your already troubled mind with the details of my situation, rather I want to remind you how much I love you, how wonderful it has been for me to have a father as wonderful as you. You always told me that you were the luckiest person, for having me, but the truth is that you were very wrong, the luckiest was always me, for having my mother and you, dear dad.

I am not going to talk about the things that have happened to me during these years, but I will tell you that those words you said when I was saying goodbye, that day, when they separated us, remained engraved in my heart. "I love you, my precious little one". I must confess that on that particular day those words reached the deepest part of my being. I blushed and smiled as I walked away. And, although many times you told me those same words or similar ones, that day they were the sweetest and most special to me.

I don't know, maybe something was telling me that that would be the last time we would see each other, and that's why my mind and heart were so sensitive. Dear daddy, beloved daddy, you don't know how much I have missed you, you don't know how eager I have been every day to wake up and find out that all this has been nothing but a dream, a very ugly one, a nightmare, but that now you will be right there in the kitchen, like every day, waiting for me with my coffee and the most beautiful smile.

How sad that it is not like that, but as I said, I don't want to talk about the sad things, but about the beautiful and special ones, those that make our souls happy, those that allow us to go on, fighting, even if everything is against us. Those words, as well as the many teachings you have given me throughout my life, are always present in my mind. It was that love and affection that allowed me to get through the loss of my mother, your great love, and also what has allowed me to continue fighting without hesitation, even in the darkest moments.

I would like to tell you that I know how much time has passed, but the truth is that I ignore it completely. I only know that I have been in different places and that, although I have not seen many people, I have never been completely alone. The saddest thing is that I am not the only one in this condition, I have seen at least 20 other young people.

I am not allowed to give any more details in this letter, otherwise they will not get it to you. They have promised that they will deliver it to you if I behave myself. Don't ever forget that I love you, Dad. I don't know if we will ever see each other again, I only hope that this letter, in my own handwriting, will be the fuel you need to keep on fighting to live. I won't ask you to forget me, but I will ask you to spend most of your time living your life. I will be fine, with tears in my eyes, many tears, I ask you to break that promise you have surely made. Please stop looking for me, I beg you, don't keep looking for me.