Hello HIVE!
I'm straying a little from my normal 
A PRELUDE TO DEVASTATION
My wife Amanda and I almost never get a vacation. We've got four young kids aged 2 4 6 and 8, so even trying to get out of the house for a movie, or a meal at a restaurant is difficult. Fortunately last week was both of our birthdays and we were able to get Amanda's mom (thanks, Becky!) to watch the kids while we set off on an adventure!
We had grand plans to go to Woodstock and visit an antique mall, then the next day head up to Niagara Falls for some all you can eat meat at a Brazilian steakhouse, hit up the casino, and meet up with some other friends who were kidless for the weekend.
Sadly, as per the title, this is the tale of “The Vacation That Never Was", and the events that led up to our traditional Canadian weather ruining everything…
THE DEPARTURE
Around noon Becky stopped by our house while our youngest (Hawke) went down for his nap. Her mission: keep Mr grumpy asleep as long as possible before picking up the other little punks from the bus stop. I felt kinda bad for her. Our kids are little assholes and she was gonna deal with them all solo for 2 full days. Sucka!!
After greetings and instructions were exchanged, we wished her “good luck” were finally able to leave on the first leg of our journey. After stopping at Tim Hortons at least twice, and then making various other rest stops because I can't handle the coffee and caffeine because I apparently have the bladder of a 90 year old man and had to pee three or four times in only a 2-hour trip, we made it to our bed and breakfast.
The Full Kitchen
A TV! It worked and had streaming services!
Look at that floral pattern! You can tell it's gonna be comfortable, right?
It was a nice looking house that had converted the basement into a B&B. We weren't sure how it would end up because it was the cheapest option available and I’m like Scrooge McDuck when it comes to spending money. Since we didn't plan to do anything in the house aside from sleep, we just wanted whatever was least expensive. It turned out that it was actually really nice! It had a full kitchen, and access to streaming services so that we could “Netflix and chill” if you know what I mean wink wink. We lay down our bags and started the first of our excursions: visiting “One Of A Kind” antiques in Woodstock.
IT REALLY IS ONE OF A KIND!
This place is huge. It features three stories of vendor upon vendor upon vendor and sells everything you could possibly think of. Complete with the musty smell of soiled antiques, and a non functioning bathroom, it was the kinda place that dreams (for me) and nightmares (for Amanda) are made of. My wife claims she went “just because I wanted to go”, but I know that deep down she was hoping to find some of those wooden motivational signs that she likes to hang on every empty wall in our house.You know the signs I’m talking about, the ones that say basic things like” “Life Love Laugh” or “Family Rules”. I’m sure if she also found some broken down piece of “rustic” furniture she’d jump on that too. I hate whenever they add the word “rustic” to an item. To me, that just doubles the price of a thousand year old well used piece of junk coffee table that otherwise would be tossed to the curb. BUT once you add the fairy dust magic of calling it “rustic”, suddenly it’s valuable and desirable. Make it make sense!
Row...
... Upon row...
... Upon row!
Me? I am a much simpler individual. I just want to find collectibles like Magic the Gathering cards, Comic Books, Retro Video Games, or old Dungeons and Dragons sourcebooks. You know, the kinda stuff that makes guys attractive and desirable to the other sex. The kinda stuff that makes men marriage material. The kinda stuff that overcomes the ladies with a lust in their loins so powerful they’re overcome with the desire to rip off your clothes and show you who the REAL “Dungeon Master” is!
LIVING MY BEST GEEK LIFE
Flea markets are a treasure trove for geeky retro items. I was able to find a plethora of things that would make basement dwelling nerds everywhere squeal with delight! Behold the splendours of One Of A Kind and some of the vendors that we saw:
Look at all these comic books! There were so many long boxes available you could build a tiny home out of them. I perused the wall books of multiple vendors that adorned the peg boards like expensive Italian tiles, but didn't end up pulling the trigger on any because they didn't feel “key” enough to add to my collection. I’m currently trying to downsize my comics because my kids have taken over every nook and cranny of the house, so space is at a premium I can’t afford right now. It was fun just looking at old books and reminiscing about the yesteryears when I had disposable income. To be a bachelor once again!
I'm also a collector of retro video games, and I found multiple vendors selling those as well. I have almost everything, so it's hard for me to buy a new game when I've already got it in duplicate or triplicate. If the deal is good I’ll buy basically anything, but Flea Market vendors typically know what they have, so price things correctly. Right now I’m looking for primarily CIB (complete in box) RPG’s from the NES / SNES era, and couldn’t justify dropping $500+ on the loose copy of Earthbound I saw. I’ll have to find some hapless chump selling it for $1 at a yard sale to make that dream come true!
One of the things I saw the most were “Funko Pops”. I’ve never been into those and didn’t realize they were so popular. It seemed like every 2nd vendor had a stockpile of them they were selling. Who actually buys these things? Is it just a cycle of resellers buying them in the hopes of selling them at profit to other resellers? I swear I’ve never met anyone who collects them to “hold onto”, only people who buy them as “investments” to eventually unload on someone else.
I'm also into Retro action figures, especially Star Wars if I can find them at the right price. I've been out of the game for quite a while and didn't want to look each individual figure up on my phone so ended up skipping most of these vendors. There were many of them that had complete sets of weapons and equipment, so I was sad to leave, but I only had so much time to devote to my hobbies. I also found a ton of Pokemon stuff for sale and debated buying some for my kids… then I remembered that they just throw their stuff all over the floors and don’t clean up after themselves, so I thought to myself “f ‘em” and carried on my way.
My wife was whining about being hungry. I had some good lines ready to gaslight her into staying longer, but since it was Valentine's day, I decided to subdue my typical jerk nature and appease her by leaving. Empty handed, I bid farewell to One of a Kind! Perhaps a few years from now when we visit you anew you’ll have repaired the leaky roof and will no longer need old buckets scattered about the place, catching fetid water as it dripped from old leaden pipes to the floor.
VALENTINES DAY DINNER
Last time we were in Waterloo we went to Tandoori Knight for dinner. It is one of our favorite restaurants for Indian food, so we decided to go back. When my wife and I first started dating she wouldn't eat anything aside from macaroni and cheese or hamburgers, and things with any flavor at all were abhorrent to her. Since then her palette has improved drastically and she is very adventurous with what she'll try. We started getting into Indian and Mexican food as our Staples whenever we went out. It's something that we can't easily make at home, and that is one of our criteria when we go out to dinner. Why eat something that we can just make ourselves?
We started with appetizers of Aloo Tiki and Onion Bhajee. I'm a big fan of Cheetah beer when I have Indian food and couldn't resist the temptation to try a dark version which I'd never had before. I don't think it was as good as the classic lager, but it still hit the spot. Nothing like having Indian beer with an Indian meal.
Amanda ordered Chicken Dansak as her main, and I went with the Lamb Madras. We normally stick to things like Butter Chicken and Vindaloos, but wanted to try something different while the opportunity presented itself and we knew the food was authentic.
Beauty and the beast! I'm lucky to have such an amazing wife who puts up with me lol.
Overall we were very satisfied with our time at Tandoori night. We expected no less, as we've been there before. The service was slow although there weren’t many people there, which was odd. In the end we didn't think our choices were as good as our typical Butter Chicken and Vindaloo’s, but we were still glad to have tried something different.
THE TIDES OF FATE
Upon return to our B&B we watched a movie that was so forgettable I can't even remember its name. I think I played Splinterlands the whole time, and Amanda watched reels about skin care and sunscreen. We retired to bed early to prepare ourselves for our travel to Niagara Falls the next day… or so we thought. When we woke up, fate had other plans for us.
Of COURSE there was a severe winter storm warning in effect. Since it was our first vacation in almost two years, it was bound to happen. We had to weigh the prospect of risking death in a three hour car ride through a winter storm vs heading home in defeat. Obviously, I wanted to press on, but Amanda guilt tripped me into “thinking about our poor children” when they end up parentless due to driving off the highway at 120km/h. I was still willing to go all in for that delicious bottomless meat and gambling, but I remembered that my kids wouldn’t know how to access my HIVE account, and I’d hate to see all that HP go to waste, so relented.
We called the friends we were supposed to meet up with and they said they weren't willing to risk the weather so canceled their trip to Niagara Falls altogether. That was the nail in the coffin for us, and we decided to return home to our demon children and relieve poor Becky of her grandma duties.
Did we choose wisely? Just look at the pictures on what things looked like on our way home and when we arrived back in Good ol’ Saint Thomas Ontario. As much as I hate to admit it, I think we did the right thing.
And thus ended the saga of “The Vacation That Never Was”!
I hope you enjoyed this tale of our woes, as then at least SOME good came of it after all. I had fun writing this and sharing a little more about my myself and my family.
Psilence